


Time Heals All Wounds

by UniquelyQueer_67



Series: Historical Context is Key [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Afterlife, American History, Angst, Biblical References, Bisexual Merlin, Bisexuality, Crossdressing, Drag Queens, Drama & Romance, Emotional, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, F/M, Fix-It, Gay Bar, Gay Bashing, Gay Rights, Great Depression, Growing Old, Hell yeah for inclusiveness!!!, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Hurt/Comfort, Immortality, LGBTQ Themes, Language of Flowers, Like, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Pining, Plot, Post-Season/Series 05 Finale, Queer History, Queer Themes, Reunions, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Some fluff maybe, Tags Contain Spoilers, Time Shenanigans, Timeline Shenanigans, World War I, World War II, also, booooooooo!, did i mention that the sidhe are dicks??, honestly that's expected of me now, many OCs - Freeform, or in some kind of minority, other historical events, some hetero, super old, the sidhe royally fucking with Arthur, they're not shitty, vague non-specific afterlife
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-09-25 12:48:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 19,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17121665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UniquelyQueer_67/pseuds/UniquelyQueer_67
Summary: Arthur is dead. He is in the care of the Sidhe when they make him an offer that will allow him to see Merlin again, but at what cost?





	1. Time Flies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lyss2011](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyss2011/gifts).
  * Translation into Español available: [Time Heals All Wounds (Traducción)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17813579) by [lbp98l](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lbp98l/pseuds/lbp98l)



_How long's it been now?_ Arthur asked himself,  _one thousand...four hundred years?_  

Darkness shrouded the once great king as he watched the living go about their lives. Living fast, yet somehow managing to waste their time so often. Arthur knew he was dead, but he was allowed to watch the world keep going from above, or below? To be perfectly honest, Arthur knew very little, considering the impossibly long time he'd just been sitting here. He remembered a time when grief consumed him, when he would spend days just crying out his anguish; but that was a long time ago...

Then, his morbid little routine was rudely interrupted by the presence of a small blue creature floating in front of his face. 

"You're blocking my view." he swatted half-heartedly at the creature,

"I am a messenger of the Sidhe, we are the race that-"

"I know who you are, the last time I saw you was only fifty years ago, Gods. Now, say what you want to say and leave me alone." the creature seemed slightly taken aback.  _Newbie_ , Arthur thought.

"Uh, the Sidhe would like to propose an - um - an offer..."

"Tell them I said no."

"But I haven't even told-" Arthur poked the messenger moderately gently in his tiny chest before interrupting him.

"You don't have to. Listen to me, child, I have been in this place for fourteen centuries. Your kind give me this "offer" every ten years; and  _every time_ I refuse." the messenger opened his mouth to speak but Arthur continued, cutting him off, "I have been asked  _one hundred and forty times._ So what, pray tell, makes you think that  _you_ can change my mind?" the messenger pulled his brows together and took a deep breath in preparation for his reply.

Arthur rolled his eyes, _t_ _his should be good._

"My Lord," Arthur flinched, did nobody tell this child that Arthur did not take kindly to that title (or any title, for that matter) "this time we offer for you to visit for a whole day per decade, not just for a few hours."

"My answer stands-"

"I wasn't finished." Arthur scowled at the boy. He dared him to finish that sentence. He cleared his throat,

"Merlin needs you, sire." Arthur was tempted to throttle him. It wouldn't take much effort, given his size. The rage was clearly visible on his face but the boy had gall, so he continued,

"He's destroying himself. He is barely eating and he has no home to go to. I think, maybe, if he just  _saw_ you. He wouldn't need to know if you were real or not, but it would just be a reminder to him. The reason he waits for...for so long..." the boy began to falter as he saw Arthur's head drop and heard his puffing breath through his nose.

"Get out of my sight." the words were soft, but hard as stone. The messenger decided, however, to take one more risk,

"No!" he yelled, soaring for Arthur's window; the fallen king swatted at him, trying in vain to catch him in his fist. The blue child got to Arthur's only view into his kingdom, and tapped it with his finger, sending huge ripples through it as the image warped and morphed.

Arthur cried out, but just as his hand was about to close around the messenger, he snapped his fingers and disappeared into bluish smoke. Arthur turned to the window, panting, to see the extent of the child's damage. His breath caught in his chest as his eyes landed on a nondescript patch of foggy woodland; and a crumpled pile of rags and pale, dirty skin and bone.

" _Merlin..."_   Arthur gasped, taking in the ghost of his best friend. He was impossibly thin; his face no longer sharp or sculpted, but jagged and jaunt; Arthur feared his limbs would snap under the  mere weight of his body. He still looked young of course, but his eyes were sunken into his skull and sat atop great purple bags. His hair was shoulder-length and matted and his clothes hung from his body. His breaths came in croaky rasps and he was shaking with cold and exhaustion.

Arthur swallowed thickly, "Oh, Merlin. What have you done to yourself, you absolute  _idiot_..." he moved his hand closer to the window, attempting to gently touch the image of Merlin's face, wishing with all his heart he could wipe the tear from that man's face, when his hand went straight through, throwing him off balance and sending him face-first through the window.

As he fell through oblivion, a single voice pierced his shouting, "Thank you for accepting the offer, King Arthur Pendragon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know why but I just really like the idea of this fic, I hope you all share my enthusiasm!😊


	2. Pinch Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1909.

Arthur hit the muddy ground with a thud. 

It was incredible; the smell of wood and grass and nature filled his nostrils, he could feel the texture of the ground beneath him, he could see the faded greens and the perfect, pure white of snow blanketing the forest around him. But it got less and less incredible as the snow started melting into his breeches.

The king stumbled to his feet and searched his surroundings. He plodded through the forest, his feet now much heavier than he ever remembered them being. In the distance, he heard the sound of hooves padding along a path that Arthur couldn't see, and the aching and creaking of the wooden carriage in tow.

He stepped through canopies of trees dripping with the translucent shapes of icicles and listened intently to the sound of his feet in the snow. But, try as he might, he couldn't fully enjoy the feel of being (if only half) alive again until he saw Merlin again. But not just  _see_ him, see  _him_ \- the man he once knew and called friend. The man who granted him so much wisdom and kept him guarded day and night in a blanket of magic. He wanted to see  _that_ man, not the frail, one-foot-in-the-grave apparition that he saw through that window.

He reached a clearing covered with various coloured flowers, all beautiful and in full bloom despite the harsh weather, when he saw him. There, in the centre of a patch of Adonis, Aconite and Galirum, sat the wisp of a man that was once feared throughout the land of Albion.

Then he spoke.

"Why?" he said, his voice rough and croaking from lack of use, "Why do I still see you, Arthur? Why, after all these years," he looked up at the sky, as if addressing some great power, "does your face still haunt me, in perfect detail, as if you still walk with me; even after I watched you die..." he reached for a single bud of Galirum and plucked it from the stem, "watched your kingdom fall," his tone turned from mournful to sour as he crushed the flower in his fist, "watched everyone we knew and loved waste away," his voice cracked as he opened his fist to the mangled flora, " and  _perish_!" his pale eyes now glowing a brilliant gold, the flower bud burst into flames before Arthur's very eyes, hovering just above Merlin's palm.

The warlock was screaming now, " _I have waited all these years, for YOU, for your LEGACY!"_ the flames turned an angry shade of red, " _I STAYED HERE THROUGH THICK AND THIN WITHOUT YOU AND FOR WHAT!?"_ he howled, and despite the size of the flame consuming the flower, it roared like it was consuming an entire village. Arthur realised that the reason for this was because every single Galirum flower that bloomed in that wide clearing had burst into the same angry, blazing red flames. Arthur felt his blood run cold. He came here to save Merlin, not be the final stage in his decent into madness.

"Merlin!" Arthur yelled, hoping against hope that the warlock would be able to hear him, but his words came out as nothing.  _The Sidhe..._ he thought. And with that, Arthur waded through Merlin's rage-induced flames, unwavering as they licked at his breeches and his boots and even the hem of his chainmail. The warlock screamed and screamed, the pain ripping through the air and the haze of heat surrounding him until Arthur finally placed a gloved hand onto the shoulder of the bravest man he ever met.

 

{«~»}

 

The fire ceased, the blackened buds fell onto the ground before disappearing into the soil as ashes and growing new buds in their place. The brilliant gold faded from Merlin's eyes until magic was replaced with awe and reverence and  _adoration_.  Arthur smiled down at the man, a silent "I forgive you" passing between them, then an "I'm sorry" as Arthur wrapped his warlock into a warm, welcoming hug. The bony figure squeezed back as hard as he was able, clawing at Arthur's armour like he was fighting for some kind of permanent grip.

Arthur felt his body begin to dissolve.  _No,_ he thought, _I can't go yet, I don't want to leave him!_ But then:

 

"I will always wait, Arthur. I'm not done yet. Don't you worry..." those words echoed through Arthur's mind as he was sent barrelling back into whatever hellscape in which he had spent all those long  _long_ years.

Those words gave him hope; because Arthur Pendragon wasn't done yet either, not by a long way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll do this for every chapter, here's a link to stuff that happened the year each chapter takes place:  
> https://www.onthisday.com/events/date/1909
> 
> Adonis - sorrowful remembrance  
> Aconite - misanthropy/reclusiveness  
> Galirum - Patience


	3. All's Fair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1915.

In Flanders fields the poppies blow  
Between the crosses, row on row,  
That mark our place; and in the sky  
The larks, still bravely singing, fly  
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago  
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,  
Loved and were loved, and now we lie  
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:  
To you from failing hands we throw  
The torch; be yours to hold it high.  
If ye break faith with us who die  
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow  
In Flanders fields

\- John McCrae

 

* * *

 

 Arthur watched Merlin improve from the window, saw him begin to eat again, being able to afford a small cottage thanks to his job as a coal-miner. It was a rather profitable industry it would seem, many called the substance "black gold". All was peaceful and the world was making progress as well as Merlin. That was until the sixth anniversary of Merlin starting his new job. Arthur decided he would visit him at his local market a few miles from his home; but when Arthur arrived, a man in uniform stood atop a raised pedestal in the square and gave an announcement to the gathering crowd - in which Arthur was blending in quite well thanks to the Sidhe donating appropriate clothing for the king to don. Merlin stood amongst the crowd in modest clothing with a cap, holding a basket full of produce.

"Attention! Attention!" came the voice of the man, Arthur watched as Merlin's face hardened.  _Of course he saw this coming_ , he thought as he shook his blonde head.

"I will be required to make this announcement at almost 30 town squares today so I will make this quick." he cleared his throat before continuing, "As I am sure you all well know; there is a war on." chatter rippled through the crowd instantly, "Settle down, settle  _down!_ There is a war on and His Majesty's armies are lacking-I said  _s_ _ettle down!_ We implore as many able-bodied men as are willing in this town to sign up- _for God's sakes shut up!"_ every member of the crowd went almost dead silent. The officer exhaled in exasperation, "Thank you. As I was  _saying_ \- we, His Majesty's finest, require more able-bodied men to aid their country and Her allies in reaching victory. I will remain here with my colleagues for exactly an hour and a half to supervise sign-ups. Thank you, and God save the King."

The man stepped down from his pedestal and did as promised, and a line slowly began to form at the makeshift desks near where the officer just stood. Arthur pulled his own cap further down over his forehead, casting a shadow over most of his face. Merlin's voice floated over to his ears and Arthur observed his conversation intently as he leaned on a nearby market stall, feigning fascination over a single piece of rhubarb,

"I don't know, mate, is it really worth it?" that was Merlin, definitely,

"Of course it is, you're servin' king and country!" Arthur didn't recognise him, but he supposed it was a friend of Merlin's. The king repressed an unwanted pang of jealousy as the unnamed voice continued,

"The birds'll be all over yah!" Arthur rolled his eyes.  _Yes, because Merlin's always been a real womaniser_ , Arthur chuckled quietly to himself as he recalled just how awkward Merlin was around him and imagined how he would act around a  _woman_. Comedy gold, honestly.

"Mike, I've told you a thousand times; I'm not interested in any of that domestic bloody nonsense. I just want to  _do my job_."  _Of course that's what he'd say._

"You'll still be doing  _a_ job - it's just that this one will involve sho-"

"Shooting people, yes I know, Mike. That's another reason I don't want to do it."

"God, Emmet, you're such a bloody  _poof!"_

"I am  _not_!"

"Mate, you're a poof."

"Mike, will you  _keep your voice down!"_   Merlin attempted to hush this "Mike" fellow. Said fellow inhaled deeply and opened his mouth, presumably to shout something embarrassing, when Merlin clamped his hand down over the man's mouth with a grip like a vice and slammed him roughly into the wall a little way from where Arthur now stood after being told by the stall owner to "Stop hogging the rhubarbs".

"Look, if I sign up, will you shut that  _ruddy mouth of yours!_ You know damn well that this bleeding town already thinks I'm a weirdo because I live in the back of beyond - I don't want them to start to think I'm, that I, that I'm a-"

"Poof?"

"Yes, that. I don't want them thinking _that_ because a mate of mine thought it would be funny to yell lies across the  _bloody town square!"_ and with that, Merlin let Mike go and marched off to the sign-up queue, the man quickly following with his head hanging like a child after being scolded by his parent.

 

{«~»}

 

Not long after that, Arthur felt the tell-tale signs of his body dissolving begin to pick up. So he swept into the nearest empty alleyway and waited to return to the Other Place.  _Merlin, a soldier_ , he thought,  _this should be good_.

And then it wasn't.  _Then_ , it was all blood and bombs and dysentery.

And poppies. Lots and lots of poppies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/events/date/1915  
> I had to jig chapter 2 about a bit regarding dates, so sorry about that. It should appear now as 1909 not 1899.  
> And apologies for the use of the word "poof" (for those of you who don't know, it was yet another not-so-nice word used to describe gay people - particularly men - historically, and even today, in the uk).


	4. 1 Timothy 6:10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1927.

Arthur had seen so much happen to Merlin recently, but couldn't bare to visit him through it all. It didn't matter anyway, he supposed. Arthur wasn't allowed to be  _seen_ by his friend, let alone give him his condolences when Mike died of an infection in his severed leg - or be there to try and talk Merlin out of his plans following the explosion that killed every man in his squad (except Merlin, of course). The warlock ended up hijacking an armoured vehicle and driving himself as far away as he could before anybody arrived at what was left of his area of the trench.

He dumped the car at the edges of the battlefield to avoid suspicion and stayed in a hotel for a while, burning his army uniform and all his belongings. He then met up with a woman who provided him with new identification and a passport which he used to board the next ferry to the United States. At this point, the Great War was over; what remained of King George's men went back to their families, and every woman who was granted financial independence and the opportunity to see what it was like to live freely (thanks to conscription sending all the men away), went back to their domestic roles.

Merlin came upon a large sum of money after selling an artefact he had acquired in his  _very_ long life. He bought a nightclub and mostly tried to lay low, making the most of the booming economy. Arthur decided he would visit him then, the Sidhe dressing him appropriately.

He visited during open hours, of course. The night sky seemed peaceful - Arthur was reminded of hunting trips long journeys on horseback.

Smiling at the pleasant memories, he opened the doors to a building bursting with people. Everywhere Arthur looked he could see women of the night dressed in short frocks dripping with jewels laughing animatedly as they pretended to be interested in the conversation of some big-wig sipping from a glass of whiskey. To Arthur, it seemed like some kind of dimly lit pantomime of "The High Life", a caricature of what it was like to have money. The king kept his head down and sat at the bar, quietly ordering some whiskey, shaking his head good-naturedly at his own hypocrisy.

Arthur barely had time to pay for his drink when one of aforementioned women sat down on the stool beside him.

"Hey, gorgeous." she drawled, Arthur chanced a look to his left and saw her uncross her legs before crossing them again the opposite way around, all without moving his head.

"Hey." Arthur grunted, placing his drink back onto the bar.

"Never seen  _you_ in here before." she spoke sweetly, trying to coax Arthur into conversation. Arthur didn't see the point of resisting, it's not like he'll be around long enough to sleep eith this woman anyway. A conversation was all she'd get out of him.

"I'm just visiting."

"Ooh, a traveller, are you?"

"It passes the time."

"I hear ya." she hovered her hand near Arthur's drink, the blonde nodded his permission for her to take a sip. He  didn't really like it anyway, "Must be hard though, never staying in the same place for long. You ever get lonely?"

Arthur thought long and hard about exactly how honestly he'd answer that, "Sometimes. Who doesn't?" he opted for partial truth.

"Ain't that the truth. What's your name, anyways? I'm Gloria." she held out her slender hand for Arthur to shake. He took it, straightening up, but still not allowing his face to show too much.

"Charlie." he lied.

"Like that funny guy in the movies!"

"Who?"

"Never mind, you're probably not a film-watching man, are you?"

"Too much travelling, I'm afraid." Gloria chuckled slightly,

"That's a shame." they both paused for a long time. Gloria was the first one to continue speaking.

"You ever been to one of these places before?" 

"Not really. Thought I'd try it out."

"Makes sense, a lot of folks are trying this kind of thing out in these new modern times."

"What? Drinking in a fancy building?" Gloria full-on cackled at that. Putting one hand on Arthur's forearm, she continued,

"You're funny." then she took off her hand. Arthur thought there was something strange about that. He wasn't uncomfortable with her touching him, and the way Gloria said that she found him funny seemed very exaggerated, like some kind of code...

Gloria exhaled loudly before rising from her stool, "Have a good one, handsome." she patted him on the shoulder before starting to walk away. Only then did Arthur remember why he came back to the land of the living,

"Gloria!" he whipped around, yanking his coat collar over the lower half of his face,

"There you go." she said with her back to him, "Sit tight, I'm coming back." Arthur settled back into his stool again.

"Can I ask you something?" he requested once Gloria had settled back in her stool again.

"Sure."

"Do you know the owner of this place?"

"Yeah, we're good pals." she joked.

"Do you know how he is?"

"How he... _is?"_   she seemed a little taken aback that all Arthur wanted to know was how this man was doing, especially without simply asking the man himself.

"He's - er - he's, fine, I guess...why do you care?" Arthur just shrugged in response, causing Gloria to pause in thought.

"Why won't you let me see your face?"

"Just being careful." Gloria sprang to her feet, grabbing Arthur's arm and yanking him to his feet. Arthur hid behind his coat collar.

"Careful, my ass. Show me your face. Now." she gripped his arm tighter, grabbing for his collar. Arthur dodged her easily, only catching a glimpse of her short dark hair and bright red lip.

"Sorry," he wriggled out of her grip easily now, "no can do." he turned and started to run as soon as he felt his body begin to melt.

"Larry! Crowley! We got a mole!" he heard Gloria's distant shouting as he struggled to squeeze through a blockade of club-goers. 

Suddenly, six or seven surly looking men sprang to their feet, smashing glass bottles on the nearest hard surface, brandishing their weapons at some of the taller women in the bar. Gloria grabbed a bottle from the ground before throwing it back down onto the floorboards and yelling "Scatter!"

Every person in the building did as they were instructed. People flooded out of the doors and others ran down the steps to the lower level, repeating Gloria's instructions. One man from behind the bar reached under it retrieved three large guns, throwing them to the men with the broken glass weapons. Gunshots  and screams echoed through the club as people from the lower levels ran, panicked, from the men firing at them. Gloria stood at the foot of the stairs, ushering people back down them, saying something along the lines of "Other exit."

Meanwhile, Arthur watched the chaos from a nearby corner, waiting for his body to fully disappear. Just as the blackness filled his peripheral vision and was about to consume the rest of it, Gloria caught sight of his face. At that moment, an escapee grabbed her by the waist, pulling off her short wig and trying to pull her down the stairs.

She couldn't help but gape at Arthur, her makeup smudged and almost completely gone, revealing her sharp features. The last thing Arthur saw before he disappeared was Merlin's eyes staring in disbelief as he was roughly dragged down the stairs by the man and away from the attackers.

"It was you." Arthur whispered as he fell back into the blackness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/events/date/1927  
> I seem to have developed an affinity for biblical references in my works...whoopsie 😅. (I won't tell you what it says, I like to make you guys work for it😉 - also, Charlie Chaplin)  
> Can we say, queer history?? Being gay was actually pretty okay in the 20s, all things considered. There were gay bars too, although people would call them "pansy clubs" instead. Despite all this, I needed some drama, so there you have it, hate crime, everybody say boo!!!!  
> (I've updated the tags to accommodate to the mentions of violence as well)


	5. It Cometh Before The Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1933.

_"In other periods of depression, it has always been possible to see some things which were solid and upon which you could base hope, but as I look about, I now see nothing to give ground to hope—nothing of man." -_ Former President, Calvin Coolidge

 

* * *

 

1929 was a rough one, Arthur remembered the day he watched the event that lead to the beginning of the Great Depression. Merlin's club had been repaired again but was slowly going out of business due to many believing it to be unsafe. Arthur saw the warlock listening to the radio when the news hit of the Wall Street Crash. He let out a long-suffering sigh and Arthur concluded that Merlin had known this was going to happen all along anyway.

Now, four years later, Merlin wandered the streets of California in search of work. Arthur was fitted with some old, ill-fitting clothes and a conveniently placed scarf to shield him from dust and cover his face. After descending through the Window and out of the Other Place, Arthur found himself a short walk from a barn. It was old and clearly not used anymore, it barely looked safe enough to stand near; its once bright red paint was faded from the harsh elements and cracked from the heat and lack of moisture. It didn't look like this land had seen rain in a very long time.

Then, through waves of heat rising from the asphalt, a young man appeared with dark hair and a chin coated in stubble. Arthur ducked away behind the barn and watched Merlin hobble his way toward its doors, a large bulge in the front of his coat indicating that he was harbouring supplies of some kind. Pulling the great slabs of wood open with a tired creak, he stepped over the threshold, surveyed his surroundings (presumably to ensure he wasn't followed) and muttered a spell (presumably one of protection) before closing the door of the barn behind him.

Arthur let his mind wander - why did Merlin need a whole barn to himself? Why did he wish to hide it? What was he hiding in there?  _Was_ he hiding  _anything_ in there? Arthur's thoughts were cut off when the voice of his friend started humming from beyond a large crack in the wall of the barn. Anxious as to why Merlin was starting to talk to himself again, Arthur pressed his ear to the crack, hearing a conversation.

"Who is she?" came a voice most certainly not belonging to Merlin, but to that of a child; Arthur suspected he must be at least 7 or 8 years old,

"I don't know, why don't you ask her?" Merlin spoke kindly to the boy - although Arthur still hadn't a clue what they were talking about,

"'Scuse us, miss, but what's your name?" the boy got no answer. Merlin decided to contribute,

"Maybe she speaks Spanish?"

"Oh! You're right!" the boy cleared his throat, before speaking a language that Arthur did in deed recognise as Spanish,

"Disculpe, me llamo Miguel. ¿Cómo te llamas?" Arthur supposed his name must be Miguel, then the girl to whom they were speaking, replied.

"Uh-um, n-no hablo-habla- I don't speak Spanish, I-" she stuttered out her answer, Merlin comforted her,

"That's fine, we just want to know your name."

"It's Adelaide." she paused for a moment, thinking, before adding to her statement, "Thank you, mister. For saving me from the bad men..." Arthur heard a rustling and assumed that the little girl was hugging Merlin. He smiled slightly, because of course Merlin would save a little girl from a bunch of rowdy thieves. Arthur decided he'd try and peek through the hole. He saw Merlin, a little girl in a white frilly dress with intricate lace. Perhaps her Sunday best? It was dirty, so it was likely that Adelaide had been wearing it for days, poor girl. Miguel wore ill-fitting clothes that he obviously picked up from different places. His gloves didn't match and they both had the fingers cut out; and his leather boots were severely worn down.

"It was nothing really... this is Miguel," Merlin gestured to the smiling boy, who interrupted whatever Merlin was going to say next,

"I'm eight! How old are you?" he addressed Adelaide,

"Six." she perked up slightly at Miguel's beaming expression, Arthur found himself doing the same.

"Ha ha! That means I'm in charge of you! Don't it, señor Creed, sir?" he looked up to Merlin, who rolled his eyes and sighed,

"I've told you Miguel, it's Stanley, and nobody is in charge of anybody here," he looked to Adelaide, smiling from the eyes, "we all work together-"

"Like a family." Adelaide interrupted this time, a broad smile on her face.

"Exactly." Merlin finished. Arthur had to take a moment to process that Merlin chose the name  _Stanley Creed_ as his alias, and promptly rolled his eyes at his drama-queen of a warlock.

 

It turned out that, in addition to Adelaide, Merlin  _was_ carrying supplies under his coat - including some cans of food, a blanket, and some bandages which he used to patch up a gash on Adelaide's arm. They all heated the food in one can using a fire that Merlin lit using his magic, much to Adelaide's amusement. Then they simply ate, and talked, and warmed themselves by the fire. Arthur listened to some of Miguel's anecdotes as the sun set in the distance,

"-and then, when all of this is over, and the water comes back; and everyone gets their jobs back, I'm gonna get me a car!"

"A car?" Adelaide sounded sceptical,

"Yeah, a cool shiny red one, and I'm gonna spend my days workin' on it in the summer heat, listening to the radio!"

"That's weird..." Adelaide pointed out, scrunching up her features, Merlin chipped in at this point,

"Now now, Addie. Miguel's dream may not be something you would think up, but it makes him happy. It gives him something to work for, and at the end of the day that's all anybody needs." Adelaide sat quietly for a moment, thinking to herself,

"I want a doggie!" she piped up at last, Miguel pulled a face,

"What, like a little white fluffy one?"

"No! Like a big scary one! So I can look after it and take it for walks and scare off bad men!" she sprang to her feet and started imitating the hypothetical dog, snarling and curling her fingers to look like claws,

"I think you could scare them just fine like that!"

"Miguel!" they chased each other around the fire for a while. Then they both collapsed back onto their chairs as Merlin finished collecting the spoons they used to share the can. They both began to yawn, then Merlin spoke,

"I think it's time the two of you went to sleep." protests began pouring out of the kids' mouths, but Merlin shushed them with a promise,

"If you go to sleep now, I'll use some of the firewood out back and whittle you both those things you want, hey? A car and a guard-dog?" they both agreed enthusiastically, and gathered their blankets to settle in for the night. Merlin wished them goodnight, then walked over to the door of the barn, opened it, and stepped outside.

Arthur pulled away from the crack in the wall, only to realise that he was sitting right next to a pile of firewood. He scrambled to his feet as quietly as he could and rounded the corner of the barn, out of sight. he watched Merlin grab two pieces of firewood from the pile, take a deep breath of country air, and breathe. Arthur smiled at the reminder of sunny days out on the training field and nights high on the castle ramparts looking out on a sleeping Camelot.

Arthur dissolved peacefully into the blackness, returning once more to the Other Place to await his next visit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/date/1933  
> Some backstory on Miguel: his parents immigrated from Mexico to find work, but were deported during the Mexican Repatriation (1929-1936), but Merlin found him and took him in. Thanks to the National Farm Worker Ministry website for making my research easier. Here's a link to the article I used:  
> http://nfwm.org/farm-workers/farm-worker-issues/timeline-of-agricultural-labor/  
> About the previous chapter. I know it seems like I've got some kind of thing about putting Merlin in drag, but i don't. I just thought it appropriate for the era 😊.


	6. Eyes Peeled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1943.

It was that time again; Arthur decided to visit Merlin.

It was a dark and stormy night, as they say in the novels, and the next Great War was well under weigh. Merlin managed to afford an apartment on some nondescript street in some ordinary area of Manhattan. Miguel and Adelaide stayed in California, seeking education and work, but not without the parting knowledge of Merlin's true identity (they kept the secret obediently). Arthur listened to his shoes clicking against the wet, paved streets as he made his way up to Merlin's apartment building. The rain poured over the glass in torrents that reminded Arthur of the stream he so often visited during hunting trips with his men (and Merlin, of course). He opened the doors to an elderly woman scribbling into the registry. She spoke with a voice hoarse from chain-smoking (because of course she did).

"Can I help you?"

"Flat number 106?"

"Family?"

"Friend."

"Third floor" she placed an unremarkable silver key on the desk, "have a nice day." she recited, before returning to her scrawling. Arthur approached the desk, took the key, and began the journey up the stairs to Merlin's floor. The rusted copper numbers indicating the warlock's apartment caught Arthur off guard. This wasn't some old barn, Arthur had told the Sidhe, not this time - he  _had_ to be more discreet. 

Using his immortal soul to possess an unsuspecting messenger with a single letter (conveniently addressed to Merlin himself) wasn't exactly what Arthur had in mind. Nonetheless, Arthur composed himself before knocking on the wooden door. Jazz music could be heard seeping out into the corridor, putting Arthur's nerves at ease - because wouldn't that be a sight; Merlin listening to jazz...

He knocked sharply and waited. A few clicks sounded on the other side of the door before Merlin opened it slightly. Peeking his head through, he smiled hospitably,

"Hiya, how can I help?" Arthur had to have a moment. Which was very embarrassing. But not nearly as embarrassing, he noticed, as Merlin - in his pyjamas, toothbrush hanging from his mouth, and face covered in shaving cream. Arthur snorted,

"Sorry if I've disturbed you." he tried to hold back another snort, when Merlin disappeared back behind the door completely, before opening it fully to reveal a deceptively simple living room. 

"Come on in." he invited, strolling back inside and migrating to the bathroom (presumably where he had been before Arthur knocked). Arthur stood awkwardly, until he saw the record player, which had just started playing a different song. He smiled at its rich purple colour and was reminded of the time Merlin had been enchanted by Morgana, spending the next few days trying (and failing) to kill the king. 

"Don't make yourself too comfy," Merlin joked, now fully shaved and teeth brushed (still in his pyjamas though). Arthur smiled a little but didn't move, 

"That means," he began, moving to a plush recliner and sitting in it, "coat off, shoes off and," he gestured to the couch opposite himself, "sit down."

"I was told this was a quick in and out." Arthur recited, Merlin waved his hand and shushed him, sipping from a mug of (presumably) coffee.

"Nonsense, if you've got time to get here, you've got time to have a brew. Sit down, I insist." Merlin didn't move until Arthur had removed his shoes and coat, and settled onto the grey-blue couch. Then he stood, and walked with purpose to the other end of the room. 

"Sugar." Arthur called out just as Merlin was about to leave. The warlock turned around and gave Arthur an inquisitive look, "I take one sugar in my coffee." Merlin smiled at that, one of his smiles that took up his whole face, and Arthur couldn't help but smile back. The man came back with the coffee suspiciously fast and Arthur presumed he'd used magic, opting not to bring it up. Merlin handed him the mug and Arthur took it with a nod of gratitude.

"So," the dark haired man began as he sat back in the recliner with all the grace of an old hag, "what's all this about?"

Arthur cleared his throat, "Well, Mr Brook, it's not much. I've been sent by his majesty to deliver this telegram." he took the offending letter (addressed to a Richard Brook) out of his trouser pocket and held it out for Merlin to take. The young man obliged, his face contorting after realising the seriousness of the matter. He unfolded it briskly and skimmed through the words, before folding it again, sighing, and placing it onto the arm of his recliner.

"Y'know, my friend, I've always wondered whether informing the British Government of my...past was ever  _really_ a good idea..." he stood from the recliner and began pacing in front of Arthur. He swallowed thickly; _he needs to accept this, he has to_ , thought the king. He bit his tongue though, "and now, if I have this correct, after I  _deliberately_ try my best to lay low and disappear, you knew exactly where I was  _anyway_?" he was looking at Arthur now, no,  _into him_. The man spoke with all the venom of a tired, old war veteran who was determined to just  _live out his life in peace_. So, therefore, Arthur did what he always did when faced with a threat, on those rare occasions where Merlin would show his teeth. He stood up straight, folded his hands behind his back, puffed out his chest, and reminded his manservant how important he was,

"With respect, _Mr Brook_ , I have read your file and, based solely on what I have read, I have come to the conclusion that you are more qualified than anyone to act as a spy for the Allies. You have proved time and time again your loyalty to king and country, for Al-England. You fought in the war, you- you-"  _shit_ , Arthur scolded himself for getting choked up like this. Merlin cleared his throat, placing his hand on Arthur's shoulder.

"Son, I know that right now this war seems like the only thing in life that matters. But I assure you there are more impo-"

"It's not about the damn war!" Arthur was bursting at the seems and he knew he shouldn't, but, "I told you I've read our file. I-I lost- a friend once. I let it consume me for a long time, it took so much effort to get back on my feet and accept that he was gone." he took a deep breath, "Don't go backwards." he met Merlin's eyes now. He must've seen a thousand emotions cross Merlin's face in that moment. Then, an overwhelming sympathy;  _oh, Merlin_ , Arthur thought,  _don't make this about me, I'm trying to make it about you._

Suddenly, Merlin pulled Arthur into a tight hug. He stiffened, trying not to squeeze this man so tightly, but it was a losing battle. Thankfully, Merlin pulled away before Arthur could embarrass himself. Patting Arthur on the shoulder, he smiled brightly and spoke,

"Tell them I accept the offer. But  _only_ if you're the one who delivers that telegram." he smiled again before walking back over to the recliner and grabbing his coffee.

Arthur felt his body begin to fizz, so he said goodbye to Merlin and dived into the nearest broom cupboard. His mind wandered back to the hug and he was content to just relive it in his mind while he waited to be taken back to the Other Place. He remembered the warmth of Merlin's body and the solidity of it. Better yet, it was  _real_. Arthur smiled stupidly as he thought of that time Merlin had tried to hug him and they both backed off awkwardly. _I mean, who hugs a stranger but not their best friend?_ Arthur chuckled to himself when he remembered "Gloria" from the bar, and that time Merlin disguised himself as "The Dolma". All those times he'd made fun of Merlin for being a girl and here Arthur was, thinking how much easier life could've been if Merlin  _was_ actually a girl.

 

 

Wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/events/date/1943  
> Woah, what??? That's a very odd thought, Arthur.  
> EDIT: I've just reread this, as it was so rushed, and I've made a few corrections - nothing too big (the differences are very small and won't effect how this reads, basically).


	7. Her Esteemed Majesty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1953.

Merlin finally got what he wanted after the end of that war; he moved back to California and, by 1953, lived with and worked for Miguel at his local garage in Santa Rosa.

Arthur watched intently through the window, noticing the sun shine down on Merlin's dark hair. Sweat gathering on his forehead as he helped Miguel lift a car to place a jack underneath it. The warlock yelped as Miguel placed the tool onto his toe. Arthur laughed openly and watched Merlin's face flush with the pain combined with the heat of the day. It was a stark contrast to the milky tone of his skin - Arthur always told Merlin that he should spend more time in the sun but, if he was honest, he found the man's skin was perfect the way it was. He almost found it beautiful, objectively of course. He put his hand to the Window, fingers stopping shy of the man's lips; they hovered there for a moment before Arthur caught himself staring at them and pushed his hand through. He fell through and waited patiently to land.

 

{«~»}

 

Arthur felt the early-June heat beat down on his head as he made his way to the garage. The Sidhe did not offer for Arthur to possess a body again - which Arthur couldn't have been gladder of, considering how much he pitied that poor delivery boy (who woke up with no memory of the possession, but somehow knew he'd delivered his letter, much to his confusion). Arthur just decided the whole process was too convoluted and complicated for him, and vowed never to do it again.

They were sitting in the garage, Merlin and Miguel, the door wide open and all eyes fixed on their television screen - most of Miguel's family had managed to successfully immigrate to the States once more, and they were (all 10 of them) enjoying each other's company, passing snacks to each other. For today was the 2nd of June, 1953; and the next great Queen of England was to be crowned. Adelaide was sipping lemonade and helping two young boys do some embroidery, eventually giving up after her rottweiler kept fussing over the three and resorting to teaching Miguel's young cousins how to throw a baseball - all while playing fetch with the animal.

Arthur rested his shoulder on a nearby tree and watched the scene unfold, when suddenly Merlin's voice pierced the crowd,

"Everyone, sit down, it's starting!" every person in the room immediately found a seat, one small girl sitting atop Merlin's lap, all peering into the screen before them; just as millions of others were doing across the state, the country even. Arthur thought of the family who ruled over the kingdom he once called Albion, how they had watched over it (not always wisely) for hundreds of years.  _Yet now_ , he thought, _they barely have a say in it's government_. Then he thought of his people: unique, strong, passionate and understanding of the hardships of living, and he concluded that it was for the best.

Once the crowning ceremony had concluded, everyone (not just Miguel's family, but the whole street) began moving chairs, tables, silverware and food out into the road. Once they were done, hundreds of neighbours sat together and began to eat, drink and get to know one another. Although not all treated Miguel's family with the respect they granted others, many were friendly when they saw how comfortable Merlin and Adelaide were with the group, and began to share recipes and stories from their lives. While Arthur was enjoying it all from the sidelines, he spotted a girl of about twelve in a dispute with a woman who was presumably her mother.

"I told you, sweetie, we needn't bother the man!"

"And I told you, ma, he's lonely! You can see it on his face! Look-"

"I won't look, child! And you will sit right back down with me this instant!" she grabbed the girl's wrist, "If you go all off and treating this man with the food from our table, who knows!? Maybe that band of Mexican miscreants over there might start gettin' funny ideas!" the girl looked genuinely mortified at her mother's comments. With one swift movement, she twisted out of her mother's grip, grabbed the woman's plate out from under her nose and stormed over in the direction of Arthur with vigour.

Shocked and impressed, Arthur watched her stop a few feet from the king. She thrust the food at him, "Nobody should be alone on a day like this." she said with an authority that made Arthur take the plate from her.

"Thank you." he replied simply, gawking like a simpleton. The girl nodded, walked over to Miguel's table, and began conversing with him and his family. She apologised for what her mother said and was invited to sit with the group. Arthur ate the food slowly, savouring the moment before he would inevitably return to the Other Place. He spent much of this time watching Merlin, allowing his eyes once more to drift to the lips of his friend. They framed his teeth as he smiled at a funny story from the girl, before returning to a state of slightly open-mouthed concentration. Arthur swallowed thickly and turned in his tracks, leaving the empty plate on the ground at his feet.

 

He left feeling fulfilled and content, which was rare - but soured almost, by a confused and alarming guilt that Arthur needed time to ruminate on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/events/date/1953  
> I've no idea why it took me so long to learn this, but, Queen Elizabeth II BECAME queen in 1952, before her coronation in June of THE NEXT YEAR??? How did I not know this????? Why did I think you had to have a coronation before you could actually be the monarch??? Ajkslflgmngnks?????  
> (Also, happy new year, guys)


	8. You're a S.T.A.R

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1969.  
> Y'all know.

Arthur crowded the Window one cold (he assumed) afternoon of September of 1963 as Merlin sat down with Miguel. He asked the man to call Adelaide to come over, that he needed to tell them something. Adelaide and her youngest daughter, Patience, all sat on the couch together. 

"I came here to rest." he told them, his hand sitting on Adelaide's knee while he held hers, "I think, now, that I've rested enough." he turned to Miguel, who was listening and nodding intently, and handed him a large envelope, "In this envelope is everything that makes me Albert Ollivers. I want you to burn it in tonight's community bonfire." Miguel nodded and took the envelope obediently.

Merlin took a deep breath and continued, "I've got plane tickets to New York. I'll live in the city, I've already got an apartment all lined up too - and you know how hard they say it is to do that." the group chuckled, while Patience gurgled happily, "I don't know what's gonna happen while I'm there - that  _is_ the idea - but I'll write to you both as often as I can." he paused, thinking long and hard about the next sentence, then continuing "I just wanna say thank you. For being there for me and keeping me sane through those awful years. I'd have gone stark-raving-bonkers without the two of you..."

"Oh, now don't say that!" Adelaide cut in, wrapping Merlin in a tight hug, then she said, almost in a whisper, "Lord knows you've got plenty to be insane about, though, you old coot." Merlin laughed, then Miguel stood with him and hugged him as well. Once he pulled away, he spoke,

"Señor, you  _are_ insane." he patted Merlin's shoulder, "All I can hope for is that I even came close to being half as good of a friend as that royal of yours." he added, hushed. Merlin took a deep breath, straightening up.

"You are both the only true friends I ever made." Adelaide sobbed something about her makeup being smudged and they all hugged one another, Patience almost getting squished in the process.

 

The next day Merlin boarded that plane as Percy Michaels (sentimental idiot), and made for New York City.

 

{«~»}

 

Arthur watched as Merlin got a comfortable day-job at a newspaper firm in Greenwich Village and, before long, he became a regular patron at the local inn. He met all sorts of colourful characters there, and suddenly became part of a community that he hadn't shown much interest in for almost forty years. He became particularly close with two patrons, they called themselves Sylvia and Marsha. Sylvia didn't talk much about her job, but Marsha explained hers as a career that Arthur was plenty familiar with, and had long since ceased to see as any lesser than any other career. She found it particularly funny when Merlin began referring to her as "an esteemed lady of the night".

One day Merlin brought up Gloria (under the guise of a "college hobbie") and Marsha insisted that Merlin join her troupe of performers (the "Hot Peaches"). 

Merlin politely declined.

 

Merlin had been going to the inn for around 4 years when it happened. It happened occasionally there - police officers would host raids, but were normally bribed and turned the other cheek at the supposed debauchery that occurred in the inn. Arthur had mentally labelled it as "the biggest bucket of horse muck he'd ever heard". This one though, was different.

And it just so happened that Arthur chose  _that_  particular day to visit, in _that_  particular June.

Patrons were being dragged into police cars left right and centre, when suddenly Stormé DeLarverie - a regular performer at the inn - began physically resisting. Writhing and twisting in the officer's grip, she, with her bright blonde cropped hair and distinguished waistcoat, yelled into the air,

"Somebody  _do_ something!"

Outraged, a crowd of almost a hundred patrons gathered outside the inn, Arthur joining them out of curiosity - although a large part of it was the rage he felt towards those officers. Arthur had spent most of the day at the inn, and had instantly made a friend of Stormé and her lover - whom Arthur was shocked to discover was also a woman; but he was hardly one to judge, considering how close he had become to Merlin before his "departure". He discussed the matter with Stormé. She merely laughed and told him that "You're no different from the rest of us. You just need some time to see."

The full meaning of what she had meant hit Arthur with a crippling force the moment Merlin released his grip on an empty bottle, sending it hurtling towards the police officers and hitting a car. Before Arthur had a chance to process the thought, violence broke out. A flurry of bottles and bricks filled the air, the sounds of angry shouts and pained cries joined them - the combination formed a kind of electricity in the air and Arthur's mind was cast back to the club Merlin once owned. He remembered the gunshots and the screams as he suddenly found his hand curling around the body of an unbroken bottle. Out of nowhere, another memory of Camelot filled his head.

_"Don't cry Arthur. Who knows what the kingdom may suspect."_

_"Pay them no mind, son. They've committed buggery. Beasts like them are burnt."_

_"Hug? A village boy? Arthur, you've disgusted and disgraced me on too many levels today! Return to your tutor - you shall learn the consequences of such actions!"_

And as Arthur felt the sting of the lashes he received that afternoon burn his back, the king of Camelot hurled the bottle through the crowd. He hit the largest police officer he could see square on the back of his head (right on target). The beast of a man released his grip on Merlin immediately, yelling "faggot" at Arthur. He sneered, spitting at the man as Merlin scurried to his side, his vision obscured by a copious amount of blood - that fact alone made Arthur see red. Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera had arrived at the scene around a half hour after it started and, after an uncountable amount of time spent fighting a growing crowd of "authorities", they joined in a chorus of voices sailing over the riot. Arthur would never forget the words they sung:

 

 

 

 

 

> _We are the Stonewall girls,_
> 
>  
> 
> _We wear our hair in curls,_
> 
>  
> 
> _We wear no underwear,_
> 
>  
> 
> _We show our pubic hair,_
> 
>  
> 
> _We wear our dungarees,_
> 
>  
> 
> _Above our nelly knees!_

 

 

 

 

The words floated like a mantra across the crowd. Arthur could feel every beat of his heart and the thrum of the blood in his veins screamed for him to do something  _crazy_.  He turned to Merlin, whose view was still obstructed, and smiled like a raving idiot. Merlin returned the smile equally as broadly before grabbing Arthur by the back of the neck and yanking him into a quick and breathless kiss. Arthur's breath hitched and before he knew it, Merlin moved away. They ended up being separated by the crowds and Arthur migrated to the outskirts of the riot, his skin prickling and beginning to dissolve.

As he spotted Merlin amidst violence and outrage and liberation, one thought filled his mind:

 

_I think I love you._

 

Then Arthur was gone; into the darkness and craving just one more moment with Merlin, ready to wait for the turn of the next decade with bated breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 🏳🌈🌈  
> https://www.onthisday.com/history/events/date/1969  
> Holy crap did I use a LOT of sources for this one! But, what can I say? I'm nothing if not a Flaming Homosexual™  
> Title is a play on the name of the organistaion that Marsha PJ and Sylvia R founded (Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries) for homeless LGBT youth.


	9. Ballroom Blitz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1970.

"What do you mean, _forbidden?"_ Arthur bellowed at the Sidhe Queen. Titania looked upon him with eyes of ancient ice, before she repeated herself for the third time.

"The accused has violated the terms of our bargain. You, Arthur Pendragon, did knowingly and willingly come in physical contact with Emrys - without the use of an external vessel _or_ the approval of the Sidhe council. You are, therefore,  _forbidden_ from venturing beyond the Window until the 198th decade comes to pass." the much larger blue creature remained apathetic even as Arthur slipped to his knees, his face in his hands.

"You can't  _do_ this. I  _have_ to see him!" his muffled plea did nothing to sway Titania as she took a deep breath and began speaking once more.

"The accused has vi-"

" _I know!"_   Arthur removed his hands to scowl at the Queen as she regarded him blankly. Then, without another word, herself and her minions all disappeared into smoke - and Arthur was alone.

As, it would seem, he would have to be for the next ten years. Which isn't that long, not really. Considering the centuries he's already spent in the Other Place - but this was different. Back then, he hadn't  _seen_ Merlin,  _touched_ him - Arthur didn't know any different. But now? Especially after beginning to realise his... _feelings_ for the man; Arthur didn't know if he was capable of doing this.

But it had to be done.

 

Rushing back to the Window, he attempted to find Merlin again. Even if he couldn't see him in person, this would do for now, Arthur just had to be patient. Whereas before the view was filled with neon lights and music pouring from all directions - Merlin in the thick of it all, sweat-soaked skin and eyes bright from joy and dancing - there was now just blackness. The Window was blank. Arthur couldn't even oversee his own people anymore! When would the Sidhe stop  _treating_ him like this!?

Arthur screamed in anguish, and cursed himself for doing so as he slammed his fist down onto the Window. His fist hit a solid surface, cold , like glass. Suddenly, it all came gushing out; all the love, all the times he'd seen Merlin upset and would've gladly faced a Darocha with nothing but a twig if it meant he could see that smile once more, the constant longing he'd felt around Merlin; all when he was still ruling his kingdom- oh Gods, his  _kingdom_. Grief intertwined itself with his aching, longing laced his tears, and loneliness pulled at his bones. Time did not exist, and his only source of light had been ripped from his grasp.

And all because of a single kiss.

 

{«~»}

 

Merlin awoke with a head like full of angry wasps, a throat like sandpaper, and a stomach like a hungry raccoon in a sack. He flocked to his apartment's bathroom and emptied what little was in his stomach and promptly took some over-the-counter pain relief tablets for his throbbing cranium. Sighing with relief, he headed into his kitchen to make a strong cup of coffee. Diana Ross filtered through the silence and Merlin swayed in a tired dance to the soul. Sipping his coffee, he waltzed over to his plush couch and flopped dramatically onto it, the radio continued in the distance.

Once his mug was sufficiently drained, Merlin returned to the kitchen and placed it in his sink to be washed later. He then migrated to his windowsill for his morning snoop. The warlock supposed he must look rather aloof, sitting on his windowsill with messy hair and a book in his hands, his window wide open. Really? He was just nosy.

Even in Camelot, Merlin watched people go about their lives - it was an interesting pastime. Gazing out onto the grey streets below, he watched Veronica walk with purpose out of her own building, skirt-suit freshly laundered and shoes clacking on the pavement as she approached the bus station. Merlin checked the time; 11:30 meant that Veronica was on her way to that job interview she was always chatting about with the neighbours when she went out for a smoke. Merlin hoped she'd get it- 

"Ooh, window-washer." Merlin quietly exclaimed, his eyes drifting to the white van pulling into the alleyway. That van showed up every single Friday, without fail, half an hour after Mr Tanner left for work. They were late. The driver climbed out and Merlin tried not to drool at the way Hanz's crisp white t-shirt stretched over his chest, 

"Mrs Tanner, you're a wild woman." he tutted. The forty-something woman in question lived a few doors down - Merlin had never spoken to Hanz, but he  _really_ didn't like to think about how he learned the man's name. He also found it wildly amusing that the same van would also appear every single  _Tuesaday_ , half an hour after  _Mrs_ Tanner went to bingo. Smart guy, that Hanz.

Just as the genius in question entered the building, Merlin looked over to the junction into the alley and, sure enough, that guy who always offered Merlin drinks at the new club he went to went past.  _One of these days,_ Merlin thought, _I'll accept that drink - and the first things I'll bring up are those shorts and that_ bike. He shuddered at the memory of those hideous cycling shorts and pushed off of the windowsill.

On his way back to his bedroom, he passed his mirror and, for the first time, noticed a single silver hair. Plucking it from his head, he let it fall to the floor. His false birth certificate would probably register him as around 30 at this point. Merlin sighed, he supposed he should probably just let himself get old. He couldn't sense any apprehension in the ancient magics since the Stonewall Riots. he'd congratulated Marsha & Sylvia on their creation of STAR, but preferred not to spend too much time there.

"I've been through a lot in my life." he'd told them over the payphone, "I just want to relax now, no fights, no protests, no picket lines; just me. I wish you all the luck in the world mis amigas, let me know if you ever need anything, ok?" then he'd went home and rearranged his furniture.  _Because why not?_ Merlin didn't really need his job at the news agent's either; he never did. Over the years he had managed to acquire quite a large amount of money, but he liked working. Merlin always found it kept him out of his own head.

Speaking of which; Merlin began reminiscing again. His thoughts somehow lead him to the same place they always did these days: the man in the bar.  _His bar_ , that is. He never had a specific reason to dress as Gloria, it was a number of things. He'd planned to keep doing drag for a couple of decades when he could, but he found that - after that night - he just couldn't do it anymore. He  _knows_ he saw Arthur, for certain. The only thing he had been battling in his head was whether or not it was a hallucination. He'd seen Arthur before, without him ever being there, but this Arthur was wearing the  _exact same clothes_ as the man at the bar! He'd disappeared right in front of Merlin's eyes but, Merlin swears there was something not quite right about the whole thing.

He sighed heavily, before standing from his place on his bed and making his way to the wardrobe. It was Cassie's birthday today, and what gentleman didn't visit his lady on her birthday? So Merlin picked up fresh flowers, and boarded the next bus to his destination.

 

He placed the purple violets on the grass and gazed at the gravestone,

"Happy birthday, Cas." he whispered, and with a warm smile, he turned and headed back to the bus station.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/history/events/date/1970
> 
> AAAAAHHHH!!! I'm sorry about that last part!!! Maybe we'll find out more about Cassandra in a later chapter????  
> In Victorian culture, Purple Violets mean the giver's thoughts are occupied with love for the person given the flower.   
> This was so hard to write because, like, nothing happened in the seventies??? I know there was Ted Bundy and the Vietnam War was still a thing - but there was nothing to base a premise on??????  
> Titania: after the fairy queen in Shakespeare's play, A Midsummer Night's Dream  
> Also, the song Ballroom Blitz came out in the 70s and I like it, so.....
> 
> Sources for prev. chapter:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iv5pJzPeJBI  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marsha_P._Johnson  
> https://labod.weebly.com/timeline.html  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sylvia_Rivera  
> https://twitter.com/_iAmRoyal/status/1002597399670542342  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stonewall_riots
> 
> Sylvia Rivera was also actively involved with the Black Panther Party (I'd recommend doing your research on them on sites other than Wikipedia though, I hear that particular article needs updating).


	10. Le Coup de Foudre

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1984.

By the end of 1983, Arthur was distraught. Yes, the ban did give him time to ruminate on his affections for Merlin - but, in many ways, that was the problem! He longed so much to just catch a  _glimpse_ of the man. To see if he still lived in New York, or whether he moved on. After  _pleading_ with the Sidhe, they'd allowed him his use of the window from '78, but he couldn't find Merlin with it. He found Merlin's apartment, however, the reason he could do so being that Merlin had moved on; after bribing a messenger for Titania, he found out that Merlin now lived in London. Arthur couldn't seek him out, the Sidhe lifted the ban, but Arthur simply didn't wish to tempt fate - the king wanted to be sure of his love. So, instead, he found himself basking in the culture shifts and watching as fashion magazines were filled with bold colours and odd shapes; he personally found the clothes hideous, but what they represented was what fascinated him. Women dressed to be strong, wearing large shoulder pads and suits (something Arthur valued greatly); men dressed to be bold, filling their wardrobes with colour. It was fascinating.

But he still missed Merlin, after an entire month of debating his decision, Arthur concluded that he was just being paranoid. He would have to  _see_ Merlin to know for sure. The Sidhe dressed him subtly and gave him sunglasses and a baseball cap to hide his face (which was rather lazy but he can't complain) and Arthur stood in front of the Window. It opened to a summer day (late June, he was told) on a street with a few shops and a phone box. Directly in front of where he would land was a book shop, he couldn't see the sign above it, but he assumed that would be where he'd find Merlin. He always did do a lot of reading.

 

{«~»}

 

After landing in the London street and donning his hat and glasses, Arthur immediately stepped into the bookshop and came across a middle-aged man. With tired eyes and somewhat of a nervous disposition, he spoke,

"Can I help you?" Arthur looked around the shop, before lying,

"Just browsing." he picked up a nondescript novel, examining the cover. Arthur supposed he could make light conversation, before asking if this man had seen Merlin, "So, how long have you lived in London?"

"Sixteen years, with the spouse." he looked wistful for a moment, then back to nervous,

"Oh? What's her name?" the man didn't answer. Arthur looked up from his browsing to see that the man's brow was up and his mouth slightly open.

"Umm, you did  _look_ at the sign before you came in, right?" a voice came from the door to a back room, Arthur looked over to see a man with very white teeth grinning at him. Arthur shuffled out of the door and the name of the shop practically slapped him in the face.

"Oh." he said, "Gay's The Word." he glanced down to the nervous man, "So  _his_ name would be?" he stepped back into the store. The man with the teeth laughed, before gesturing to his partner,

"That's Gethin, and I'm Johnathan." Arthur nodded hello to both men, then returned to his pretend browsing.

"You don't actually care about the books do you?" Gethin pitched in with his faint Welsh accent, eyeing Arthur curiously.

"Actually I'm looking for someone..." Arthur admitted bashfully, "He's got dark hair, pretty pale. There's barely anything to him, about my age?"

"And what made you think he'd be here?" Johnathan asked, gliding over to Gethin to slip his arm around the man's waist,

"Well, he loves to read," Arthur shrugged, "To be honest, he's the smartest man I know." understanding dawned on both men's faces,

"Mike." they chimed, Johnathan beckoning Arthur into the back room. Arthur followed obediently.

 

They stepped into the back room to see five men and a woman hovering around the room. Johnathan gestured to the one scribbling in a large book and counting change.

"There's Mike." the man turned around and Arthur visibly looked taken aback,

"That's not the man I'm after, sorry..." Arthur eyed the bespectacled man. No, he didn't look anything  _remotely_ like Merlin. His eyes were the wrong colour, his build was wrong and  _his ears were too small!_

"I'd appreciate it if y' stopped lookin' at me like that, thanks mate." he spoke in a thick northern accent. Arthur needed a save,

"I was-uh-your book! I was wondering what you were counting." he mentally high-fived himself as the man nearest Mike turned around and explained to him,

"They're donations for our support group, Lesbians and Gays Support the Miners, LGSM for short. Would you like to make a donation?" he was very Irish. Arthur didn't get much further than that before Mike perked up,

"He still looked at me funny."

"Oh don't flatter yourself, Mike, he's probably not even gay. Look at him!" this was the voice of the woman, her hair was a dyed shade of red-ish and she wore dungarees.

"I am." another voice from behind him made Arthur jump. This man had golden blonde hair and addressed Arthur with a wink and a smile. Arthur turned back to the woman, looking rather helpless.

"Ignore him, that's Jeff." she labelled the man as he slipped past Arthur and settled near a bookshelf, browsing, "I'm Steph, I make the sarcastic jokes," she gestured to herself, then to the Irish man, "He's Mark, we do what he tells us to, don't ask me why," Mark grinned innocently, "You've met Johnathan, he's an actor," Arthur looked to Johnathan again, who flashed him a dazzling smile, "you've also met Gethin, he's Welsh. And Mike handles the fiddly bits." she paused for a moment, then remembered the two other men near a different bookshelf,

"Oh and that's Reggie and Charlie, the couple." she rolled her eyes at the two, who were gushing over a book they both liked. She turned back to Arthur,

"You are gay, aren't you?" she looked quite wary as she asked.  _Understandable_ , Arthur thought.

"I'm still figuring that out..." he admitted, Steph looked sympathetic. 

"Well," she chirped, clapping her hands together, "sorry we couldn't have been of more use to you." Johnathan suddenly made the kind of "ooh!" noise of a man who just solved a particularly vexing riddle,

"James!" he yelled, pointing to Arthur. the whole room looked at him blankly (save for Steph),

"Across-the-road James? The man you buy yer grass from?" she sounded heavily sceptical of this apparent drug dealer.

"Yes! He fits er-sorry what's your name?"

"Arthur."

"-Arthur's description perfectly!" Johnathan turned to Arthur to explain, "He runs an herbal remedy place across the road, and, yes I do buy cannabis from this man. I use it for medical reasons." Arthur held up his hands at Johnathan in an attempt to convey the words "I won't judge". 

"Great!" he exclaimed, clapping Arthur on the shoulder, "We'll go over there now, I've got to pick up something anyway." Steph jumped out of her chair,

"Ooh, d'you think he'll have any fags?" 

"Other than him and myself?" Steph rolled her eyes at Johnathan,

"Don't be funny, old man, I'm coming with you." she moved to follow the two out of the door as an Irish shout of "Pick me up some too!" indicated that Mark would also like some cigarettes.

 

They both approached the shop and Arthur snorted, "Merlin's Magical Remedies and Herbs?" he asked, tears of humour in his eyes.  _Talk about hiding in plain sight!_

"Yeah, cheesy, right?" Steph mocked a sneer, Arthur supplied them both with a (false) explanation,

"He was always fascinated by Arthurian legend." Steph barked a laugh,

"Arthur!" she pointed to him, "Maybe it was fate!" she made a strange gesture at Arthur, wiggling her fingers.

"Maybe." he mused as they entered the shop.

 

There was nobody at the counter, but soft strums of a guitar echoed from a back room. Arthur shot Johnathan an inquisitive look.

"He's always playing that damned song. I asked him who he wrote it about one day. He said it was someone he'd lost,  _a long time ago_ , he said." Steph chuckled,

"He thinks he's well mysterious." they both turned expectantly to Arthur and gestured at the door to the back room. It was usefully ajar as Arthur stepped inside. 

There were boxes everywhere, full of various records. He supposed Merlin collected them now. Then his eyes landed on the man by a window, he was playing an acoustic guitar as he began to sing.

It was definitely Merlin, but not as Arthur had known him. This Merlin had grey streaking his hair, his face was wrinkled with experience and his chin was coated with a strange stubble-beard. His eyes were still just as bright though, even if they were framed by leathery skin. Merlin looked like he was in his forties, but his singing was amazing.

Arthur listened as the words "love" and "king" stood out in his ears. He watched the man sitting under the window as the sun beamed through and back-lighted him, making him appear ethereal and divine. Illuminated dust particles floated around Merlin like tiny fairy-like creatures and he smiled as he played. It wasn't a broad smile, just an absent-minded crease in the mouth and the eyes you git when you were doing something you loved. Arthur felt something in him grow soft, and flutter at the same time. The king smiled fondly as he really listened to the song. Merlin was recounting their life together, it was sweet, and funny, and Arthur wiped a tear from his eye as Merlin strummed the final few chords.

"That was beautiful." he said out loud, but definitely  _did not mean to say out loud_. Merlin looked up at Arthur in his sunglasses and hat and smiled warmly,

"Hello, can I get you anything?" he asked, just as Johnathan came strolling into the backroom,

"Hiya, James. You got my stuff?" Merlin rolled his eyes and got up, leading the two back out into the main shop.

"You were taking too long." Steph shrugged, Merlin grabbed a paper bag from below the counter,

"And Johnathan," he said, as he handed the bag to the man and took Johnathan's payment, "please stop making me sound like a back-alley dealer. I deal in alternative medicine, not cocaine, alright?"

"Well, Gethin says I shouldn't smoke anyway but, since when do I listen to doctors." he looked arrogant, and Merlin's face hardened - a look that would make sorcerers quake, once upon a time.

"Johnathan Blake, you best do as he tells you. Those doctors are trying to save your life, you could-" he choked on the next words, before abandoning them and continuing, "This is for pain relief, it's not a fucking miracle cure, capiche?" his words were jagged, Arthur swallowed.

"Yes,  _dad_."

Steph also scowled, "You've no idea how childish you sound right now, mate; this disease ain't a joke - we've all lost a good friend. You're almost forty, Johnny. Grow up." Steph piped up, "Got any fags?" she asked Merlin, who just gestured to himself and Johnathan in an attempt to lighten the mood. Johnathan chuckled. 

"Yeah, okay, you're both comedic geniuses. Do you have any cigarettes or not, James?" she sounded exasperated, but not _that_ bothered. Merlin grabbed a pack from behind his head and Steph paid for them.

"By the way," she began, and pointed to Arthur, "this guy wanted to see you, calls himself Ar-"

"Anthony!" Arthur burst out, holding his hand out to his old friend, "Johnathan told me about your shop. Thought I'd have a browse." Merlin shook his hand and smiled,

"Well, feel free to come round whenever you like." Arthur had so many questions. Some of which he could even ask without arousing suspicion! But then, just as he opened his mouth, his hand began to tingle in Merlin's grip. He looked down at it in horror and disbelief.  _Really!? I thought they were done with the bloody punishments!_  

"Are you alright?" Merlin asked, his voice warm and slightly concerned,

"Fine-" Arthur's voice cracked on the word and he realised that the tingling was starting to spread from his hand up to his shoulder. He ripped his hand from Merlin's concerned grip and staggered backwards, aiming for the door. His feet got caught on  _each other_ and Arthur toppled onto the hard wood floor. 

"Bloody hell mate, what's gotten into you?!" Steph exclaimed as Arthur scrambled to his feet,

"I have a- it's a- urgent- must go, bye." he tripped over his words this time as he stumbled to the door. He quickly turned to Merlin, "Bye Mer-JAMES. Goodbye James."  his words stiff with apprehension and out-right  _panic_ , Arthur staggered out of the shop and set off at a clumsy run.

 

{«~»}

 

He could hear Steph and Johnathan calling after him, then, Merlin. Arthur tripped slightly but kept his speed until he reached an alley. Crouching behind the dustbins, he heaved in great gasps of air. With an uncharacteristically violent jolt, he landed in the Other Place and, crumpled on the ground, was met with the dark stare of the light eyes of Queen Titania. Arthur regarded her with venom as he viciously tried to catch his breath.

"I trust you enjoyed your trip, King Arthur." the man flinched beneath her,

"Just Arthur."

"I trust you enjoyed your trip,  _just_ Arthur." her voice held no venom in its monotonousness, but her eyes now held a calm, still flame that set Arthur's blood ablaze. He did not speak, he didn't want to give Titania the satisfaction of his submission. He'd denied her deal 140 times before, just because he wished to see Merlin, did  _not_ mean she held dominion over his soul. Not now, not ever.

"Need I remind you of the terms of your _visitations?"_ only defiant silence filled the air, "Due to your, call it a  _disguise_ , you are not to miss another trip. Your time has merely been cut short this time." another break in Titania's speech, and yet another stab of silence, "Your next punishment will not be so  _kind_ , should this happen again. Do you understand?" Arthur knew she wouldn't leave until she got a sign of Arthur's cooperation.

 

He nodded curtly, and was engulfed in blue smoke.

 

His Window flickered back to life once the smoke cleared, Merlin was tuning his guitar and humming his song,  _their song_. Arthur sighed fondly and watched Merlin work. He was content, at last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/history/events/date/1984  
> This was a long one, oops. But at least we now know why Arthur refused all those times. Nobody puts a leash on our king!! 🤣
> 
> Le coup de foudre - similar to "love at first sight" or "sparks flying", but like, lightning.  
> My favourite movie of ALL TIME is Pride (2014) - it's set in my favourite cultural/musical decade, it's set where I was born (Wales) and celebrates my heritage AND it's un-apologetically and poetically gay. What more could I ask for??? I've always wanted to visit Gay's The Word too, I adore queer literature<3  
> I decided to base the chapter more off of the film than anything, because Stephen Beresford stayed very true to events, save for one fictional character (Joe), whom you won't find in this chapter.


	11. Domestic "Bliss"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 1995.

Merlin hasn't moved. He doesn't have a new name, or address, he hasn't even cut his hair! Arthur was really beginning to worry about the slowly ageing man on the other side if his Window...

The warlock was reading a book, it bore no distinct cover and no title; it was just a pile of paper bound by leather that Merlin was staring blankly at. He didn't stop reading for hours, not even getting up to eat. Eventually, he put the book down and Arthur saw it.

Merlin sighed extremely heavily - it was a painful sound, yet so fatigued. It was like Merlin just didn't have it in him anymore (whatever  _it_ was, anyway). Then Arthur remembered just how long Merlin had gone without knowingly interacting with Arthur, and how incredibly pathetic Arthur had felt when he couldn't see Merlin during the 197th decade.  _Gods,_ Arthur thought, remembering some of things that Merlin had told the king in his final days, _if his entire purpose is to serve me..._ he didn't want to finish that thought. He had already reached a conclusion.

 

{«~»}

 

Before he really caught up with his own thoughts, the position of the Window had already shifted to the only place he knew that harboured blooming Galirum:  _that_ clearing. Arthur stepped easily through the Window, his travelling privileges restored due to "good behaviour". Arthur waded through the vibrant colours of the hundreds of flowers surrounding a single Galirum, the one that Merlin had grown from the ashes of another. Arthur stopped at the flower, bent down, and cautiously used his gloved hand to scoop the plant from its place, roots and all. He carried his trophy back through the Window as he recalled what the messenger Sidhe had told him before he opened the Window fully again.

_"Any living thing that enters this world from the mortal one before its time will surely and instantly die, an average flower would wilt. But magic? Magic never dies."_

Sure enough, the flower remained perfect as he stepped into the Other Place and, as promised, Gabriel was waiting with a flower pot, ink and a quill for Arthur.

"I cannot thank you enough for convincing me to accept Titania's offer. I haven't been this happy for centuries!" Arthur beamed. Gabriel chuckled as he placed the flower in the pot, while Arthur wrote a note.

"Not bad for a rookie, eh?" they both laughed at that. Arthur put the finishing touches on his note while Gabriel shifted the Window back to Merlin. The king took a deep breath.

"Good luck, Arthur." and he stepped through.

 

{«~»}

 

The famed warlock wasn't home, of course. Nonetheless, Arthur stepped silently and cautiously to the back room in Merlin's shop. He spotted the chair that Merlin always sat in to play guitar, bathed in afternoon sunlight, and placed the pot in that exact spot. Before placing it next to the Galirum, Arthur reread his note:

 

> _Let this be a reminder, my love._
> 
> _xxx_

Brief and vague, not even Titania could fault it. It was perfect right down to the crude drawing of the sword that had become known as Excalibur just under the text, crossed with Merlin's magical staff.

The king took the opportunity to look around the man's lodgings. His blinds were bright, as was the yellow paint of the walls. A handful of framed records hung from the walls and shelves full of strange artefacts gathered little dust, it seemed. Finally, Arthur caught sight of something on the ceiling. His breath was knocked from his body as he looked up at a beautiful mosaic of faces gazing down at him. There must have been almost four, maybe five hundred photographs covering every inch of the ceiling. Arthur saw many recurring faces, Marsha and Sylvia for one. Mike also beamed at the blonde. There weren't just photographs either, Arthur could see bottle caps, stamps, postcards and tickets for everything from trains to boats to operas. Then, the oldest photograph on the wall.

A well-built woman with (presumably) blonde hair and a kind face was smiling bashfully and looking diagonally to the ground. Based on her attire and the quality of the photograph, Arthur guessed this was taken at some point in the mid to late nineteenth century. Next to the photograph was an envelope - in well-practised calligraphy, the name Cassandra assigned the woman a title. There was something vaguely familiar about her face, but Arthur can't have seen her through the window. He didn't start watching Merlin until the early twentieth, he couldn't bare to look at the man's face before that, it would've been too much for Arthur's shrivelled heart.

The king then turned back to Merlin's shelving and spotted another, equally old, photograph. In it, Cassandra stood in a (dark?) dress, strands of her wild blonde air tumbling from her tight bun, framing her face elegantly. Next to her, with an arm placed firmly around her waist and lips pressed affectionately against Cassandra's cheek, was none other than Merlin himself. Arthur fought back a wave of shocked vertigo as he stumbled backwards. He hadn't seen Merlin in a remotely serious relationship with a  _single person_ at  _all_ , since he'd started watching over him. There was something about the way that Merlin's lips smiled against her cheek that made Arthur seethe with jealousy, then sink with guilt. 

_We could've had that. I took that from him._

Then he stopped seeing Cassandra, and just saw Merlin. The way his suit fit him so perfectly while he still stuck out like sore thumb, how his eyes crinkled with happiness, and the way his smile warmed Arthur's heart. The king decided there was no point dwelling on the past, especially when Merlin looked so happy in the photograph.

Arthur had nothing to do but smile as he finally strolled  from the room, his body fizzing back to the Other Place as quick as he'd entered Merlin's home.

 

He hoped Merlin liked his gift.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.onthisday.com/events/date/1995  
> Cassie is revealed!!! A little. I originally meant for Arthur to do a quick in and out, then I saw POTENTIAL and OPPORTUNITY - and I'm not one to simply ignore those to stick to a simple PLAN, no sir!  
> Return of the patience flower!!!!!!!!  
> Hi, Lyss <3


	12. Old Friends and Old Wounds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 2005.

Merlin was out of milk. No tragic story there, I'm afraid. No wonderfully clever hook, he just needed some goddamn milk.

The warlock caught his reflection in a couple of shop windows on the way to Tesco.  _Not half bad_ , he thought, stroking his beard, _for sixty-five, that is._ He stepped into the shop, scanning the isles for his target.

"Alright, James!" came a voice from the fresh produce. Unfortunately for Merlin's boredom, it was  _not_ a piece of articulate asparagus. Cyntoia was a local teen who regularly visited _Merlin's Magical Remedies and Herbs_  to buy lavender tea. Her mother suffered from the most awful of nightmares.

"Good morning, lovely!" she beamed at him and rushed over to chat to the old man. Many of the older people in the neighbourhood hated Cyntoia and her friends; they wore hoodies, loitered near shops, smoked, and wore the _harshest shade of blue eye-shadow you've ever seen._ But Merlin knew better; hoodies were comfortable and warm (not to mention, cheap), shops are a good place to meet with friends and chat, all four girls were trying their hardest to quit, and you can hardly blame them for following a trend (even if it was an eyesore, they'd grow out of it). That was always why Merlin preferred the company of everybody  _except_ the elderly - most were bitter and angry, which only leads to isolation and loneliness in the end - Merlin knew that all too well.

Because he was much, _much_ older than them.

Cyntoia hummed, before scuffing her trainers on the ground. Then she asked what Merlin knew she inevitably would,

"Tell me another story?" the girl only partially knew of Merlin's secrets. She knew about his immortality and his magic, one leading to the other after he had to use a healing charm one day on Cyntoia's mum. Merlin din't want to tell her that his name wasn't really James, or just  _how_ old he is.

"Of course. Pick a decade?" Cyntoia thought for a moment, then blurted, "Sixties! I know how much you love that one."

Merlin proceeded to tell the story of how he'd met two extraordinary women (who still didn't get proper recognition for everything they'd done and achieved) and the part he played in the Stonewall riots. He made sure to remind her to keep that part to herself, she hadn't told anyone so far after all.

When they reached the checkout, Merlin had reached his favourite part of the story. He was just describing the bliss he'd felt as he'd kissed that strange man when someone cleared their throat.

"Sir, are you gonna scan that?" Merlin glanced down to the milk he didn't remember picking up, then shrugged and placed it on the conveyor.

"Why are you wearing those glasses, it's winter?" Cyntoia asked, referring to the cashier's sunglasses.

"I have sensitive eyes, these are so I don't get migraines." he took Merlin's milk and scanned it.

"Oh." clearly Cyndie was expecting a more interesting answer from the blonde, who had accepted Merlin's payment. He was scanning Cyndie's items when the warlock's phone rang from his pocket. Merlin picked it up, glancing at the contact name before happily answering the call.

"Hello there, stranger!" he chirped, happy to be talking to Patience again after so long,

"Hello, Merlin." her solemn tone made Merlin's face sink with worry,

"What's happened?" Merlin like to get straight to the point with these things,

"She's been admitted."

"Oh my God..." Merlin's hand slowly came up over his mouth at the news, "Addie..." he sighed.

"Yes, we had our suspicions and the appointment confirmed the news. They say she'll be transferred to somewhere nice if we don't feel able to care for her." Patience truly did live up to her name, even if she was named after Merlin's new favourite flower.

"That would probably be the best because of the-"

"-the surgery, yeah. I'm always on call, it's why Liv and I never thought we could handle kids..." 

"How's she been through this?" Merlin always liked Liv.

"She's been incredible, she even recommended a support group for people whose loved ones suffer with Dementia." despite the pair living together for so many years, Patience's voice always got so wistful when she spoke of Liv. Merlin thought it was the sweetest thing, and then he remembered these women were in their early fifties and felt his (literally) ancient bones ache with age.

"That's lovely of her." Merlin didn't know what else to say. Addie had always been such a bright girl. She had such a kind heart and a strong will, Patience is so much like her, but with the passion, dedication and, often accidental, coldness of her late-father mixed up in it.

"It made me think of all the things she never told me...all the things that, y'know, she may never..."

"I understand." and Merlin did, he  _really did_.

"Well, Miguel is still going strong. But I'd expect no less from him - old man'll probably outlive us all - well, except you, of course." Merlin chuckled,

"Now wouldn't  _that_ be an achievement?"

"Either way, it made me want to find out more. So Liv helped me find some things from the Santa Rosa Archives."

"Perks of her working there... _are you abusing your power?"_   Merlin mocked,

"Oh, knock it off, you old coot! Anyway, we found a couple of interesting things; did you know that mom is distantly related to Tom Cruise!?" Merlin's face went blank as he refused to answer, "Too cheesy?"

"Much so."

"Sorry. In all seriousness, though, we did find something really odd." Merlin scrunched his nose.

"What?"

"Well, Addie has lots of relatives in New York, but one in particular caught our interest. I don't know how many 'great's there are, but she's a great aunt, 1800s I believe."

"Go on."

"She never had any kids, no husband and, by the time she was twenty, her records said she'd left the country. We didn't know where to, so we spoke to Liv's historian friend, and he says it's likely that she moved to Britain. With our lead, we did some digging and found her-"

"-so she immigrated to Britain, get to the point or I'll assume there just isn't one and hang up because _I am in Tescos!_ "

"Okay, calm down. She was with this man, okay? We know they were probably together from contracts and other boring documentation. But they never  _married_ , and, what's more, we found a certificate of death that said she died at thirty, yeah? But,  _it didn't say how!_ She died under suspicious circumstances!"

"Why are you so excited about  _that?"_

"Because shortly after her death, the man disappeared. Not like, kidnapped or anything, he  _made_ himself disappear. His paper-trail hits a complete dead end! Which is why we don't know what he looked like'; there weren't any photographs! He probably either burned them or avoided taking any. Liv and I are  _certain_ he killed her and made a run for it, but there's no motive, not on paper anyway."

"What was the man's name?"

"Vincent Charleston." Merlin's throat went dry and he stood, rooted to the spot for a few seconds too long, "Merlin?"

"And the woman?"

"Oh, uh..." rustling and hushed voices came through the phone.

"Liv says her name is-" Liv whispers something unintelligible, Merlin gulps.

 

"Cassandra Boyle."

 

{«~»}

 

Needless to say, Merlin wasted no time getting the  _hell_ out of Tesco. Cyntoia showed up to the shop later with his milk; what a good kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, can't really add any more of those "happened in this year" things, I'm pretty sure most people remember the 2000s.  
> Do the math, Merlin is legally considered 65 in this chapter.  
> Cyntoia's name is a tribute to Cyntoia Brown after being released from a grossly unfair prison sentence after serving it for 15 years. Cyntoia, you're doing amazing sweety.  
> I'm so sneaky btw, Cassandra's story gets less blurry every time, yet with each question answered, more grow in its place! Like the hydra of sub-plots.


	13. Moving On Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 2014.

Arthur watched Merlin enter his shop early in January. His hair and beard reached past his shoulders and their white colour reminded Arthur of snow near a glade of flowers and a broken man. The old man's bones creaked as he walked, noticeably slowly and more tedious with every step. He was no longer wiry in his figure, more scrawny and bony - another reminder Arthur did  _not_ need. He pushed his key into the lock with gnarled and splotchy hands that shook with the effort, he then placed them just above the base of his spine and stretched backward, his back cracking loudly as Merlin made a kind of creaky groan akin to an ancient oak tree swaying in strong winds. He opened his eyes which, while still being brilliantly blue, had lost some of their vibrancy and electricity over the years, these were framed with wrinkles and an overall pasty complexion - all topped off with a nose bright red with January cold. 

Merlin entered the shop and didn't come out until midday. Arthur almost fell to the ground in shock as the sleek figure of a man in his early twenties emerged from the small store with a small sign under his arm. His eyelashes fluttered over irises alight with gold, equally bright and twinkling as the gold was overtaken with blue. The pale complexion glowed in the afternoon sun, tinted with a subtle and beautiful blush, highlighting the sculpted face of the man before him. Cracked lips replaced with rosy cushions, hair just long enough to harbour a slight curl as it shone in the sunlight. Strong shoulders and back shifted under a plain t-shirt as Merlin placed the sign in the front window:

 

> UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT

Proud of his work, Merlin smiled. The once great king, who had faced armies unnumbered, sorcerers and lords once bowing to his might, felt his heart flutter, his stomach perform a gymnastics routine worthy of Olympic status. He was enthralled by Merlin's smile, it was him, it was  _really Merlin_. With the creases at his eyes not from age, but from laughter, his face gleaming brighter than the sun.

Arthur didn't know how his face looked in that moment, but he let out a sigh so akin to a swooning princess that the only way he could possibly look was probably  _absolutely besotted._

Two months later, Merlin took a phone call. Arthur had no idea what it was. He knew it was Patience, who was now in her sixties, and that Merlin had been invited to something in May. So he waited, that's one thing both he and Merlin had no issue with. 

He was stunned into silence when Merlin exited his home wearing quite possibly the most incredible garment Arthur had ever seen -  _or maybe that's just because he's wearing it..._

Merlin was clothed in a sleek black tux, his crisp white shirt complementing his skin to make him appear ethereal. He adjusted his cuff-links (two little dragons, because he was still Merlin, after all) and walked around to the passenger side of a car that was to escort him to whatever event was worthy of the warlock's Godly beauty. If Arthur just so happened to admire the man's backside as he entered the vehicle, that was hardly his fault - those trousers were too strong for him.

So the decision was made, Arthur had a party to crash.

 

{«~»}

 

 _Correction,_ the king concluded as he gaped at the archway stood at the front of rows of chairs, all sat prettily on a lawn, _a wedding to crash_.

Arthur needed to blend in, so thank the  _Gods_ that all catering staff had to have a coloured stripe painted across their eyes to adhere to the "Rainbow Theme" (not in their eyes, though, that would be painful). Arthur wormed his way into the staff easily, choosing an appropriate Pendragon red to conceal himself. Then, he entered battle.

Wielding a tray of champagne-filled glasses, he strolled easily through the crowd, his disguise allowing him to hover near groups enough to catch snippets of conversation.

 

_"They've been waiting so long, bless..."_

_"Thank God for the changing of the times!"_

_"Amen, love!"_

_"Wouldn't even settle for a civil partnership, love 'em..."_

_"Wish Addie could've been here today. At least Patience'll have the photos, right?"_

 

"Excuse me?" Arthur whipped around and almost collided full-force with a woman in her sixties with dark skin and hair falling over her shoulders in tight braids, she smiled broadly at Arthur and gestured to the tray he was holding,

"Oh, of course." he held the tray out to the woman, who took it gratefully. the woman wore an elegant white suit with a pair of heeled boots on her feet and a sparkling brooch pinned to her jacket,

"Oh, this?" she pointed to the sparkling dove, "Patience's gift. I told her not to give me a wedding gift because she's one of the brides, but she insisted."

"You must be Liv?" Liv smiled more, taking a sip of her champagne, nodding yes. Just then, the young man performing the ceremony gestured for her to take her place by the altar.

"Oh," her eyes bugged as she hurriedly swigged the rest of her champagne, "we're starting now?" she shuffled over to the man and Arthur looked slightly slack-jawed at the empty glass in his hand.

 

The ceremony was beautiful, Patience wearing a gorgeous black dress to compliment Liv's own suit. Arthur remembered a discussion he'd heard between Patience and the wedding planner herself, who was apparently a close friend of Liv's.

-

_"I think it's a lovely idea." the planner had said, Patience nodding enthusiastically,_

_"Oh yes, absolutely it was. If we are to celebrate one massive milestone in the way our people and government view marriage, why not another? Interracial marriage was just as hard to attain as this, so why not highlight that? My mother  and Miguel always did love all that activism and politics, so it's almost like she's here too." the planner had nodded sympathetically._

-

Petals from flowers of all manner of colours rained down on the couple as they walked back down the isle to have their photos done. Arthur finally spared a glance at Merlin, whose tears were being mopped up by the dress of one of Patience's nieces. Of course both brides knew of Merlin's identity and were pleasantly surprised that afternoon when a young man picked up the phone.

Their surprise grew even further though, when Miguel, in a fiery red tux of his own, entered the reception; a small, chatty and very much welcome army of relatives in his wake.

"Sorry for missing the ceremony, my flight was delayed."

Merlin decided to entertain the youngest of the guests, and even a few adults, with some subtle magic - the sort he could write off as a "trick". They were delighted, and rightly so. Merlin is a blessing and a marvel; if only these people knew just how much credit he was due.

_But then, it was never really about that, was it?_

 

{«~»}

 

Arthur didn't interact with Merlin much that night. He contemplated whether he regretted this or not as he felt his body dissolve in an alley outside the reception venue. After remembering the man's carefree laugh, his tux, his electric eyes alight with a renewed kind of life; Arthur still couldn't decide. So he fell back into darkness satisfied, but impatient as ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One thing that happened in 2014, same-sex marriage made legal!!! Yay!!!  
> We're getting there, guys, only a couple chapters left!!  
> I always go into my fics with a somewhat half-baked plan - I like to just let it flow, that's how I write best. Cassandra wasn't even in my plan actually, neither was Addie. Miguel was never supposed to have a name, Titania was added on a whim, and Arthur was never supposed to miss a decade. The more I work on a fic, and research it, the more ideas I have. Merlin was gonna be super lonely, but Miguel and Adelaide gave him a family. Marsha and Sylvia gave him passion, Mike gave him confidence that he could only ever get from Arthur before.  
> Merlin's gone from a bitter old warlock, to an almost content, even older one. I loved writing this fic, and hope you all have loved going on this journey with me! <3


	14. End of the Line, Thank God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is 20gayteen.

The once great king of Camelot sat on, for lack of a better term, "the ground". As usual, everything was bleak and dark - not a single soul to be found. Arthur turned his nose up at his own pun as he rolled over onto his back, looking from the blackness surrounding him to the blackness above him. He sighed heavily as he thought how many more years he'd have to wait to see his beloved, at least two. 

"It's not that long," he spoke to himself often in the Other Place, he had to make use of his voice or he may lose it, despite the fact that he's literally  _dead_ , "I've waited longer." he picked at the hem of his tunic, as he always did when boredom struck. One some occasions, he made models out of the course fabric. Arthur let his mind wander as he began to sculpt what would eventually be a rather decent dragon. 

"I wonder when they'll let me go back..." he struggled with the wings, complex a shape as they were, "will they ever let me go back? I suppose it wouldn't be so bad if I could keep seeing him like this... except the waiting," he grunted in frustration as now the  _other_ wing refused to cooperate. After wrangling it for a few more seconds, he delicately placed it on the ground, but angrily, "I cannot stand the waiting..."

"Well, don't get too used to it." came a familiarly dry tone echoing through the, well, nothing. That Titania was relentless.

"What." it was not a question. Arthur never questioned the Queen of the Sidhe, only commanded her. But he supposed she couldn't tell the difference, never wavering in her  _own_ tone anyway.

"The Sidhe have," she paused until Arthur turned his head, "a proposition." and for the first time in over fifteen hundred years, Titania let the pitch of her town drop. Arthur internally gasped,  _in exaggeration!_

"I had no idea that you could speak with a varying tone, Tania." her eyebrow twitched so slightly you could almost believe it didn't move, "Careful, you might get whiplash." he teased further. As always, Titania was never good with banter. That was Merlin's thing, give and take, take and give.

"You're free." it was clear that she probably had planned to say more, but Arthur thought she just wanted him gone. The feeling was mutual.

"Do not toy with me, Tania. I have the sword of legend in my back pocket." Titania  _rolled her eyes_ at the sarcasm before elaborating.

"The Sidhe and I have concluded that you are no longer required to stay in our dungeons." Arthur went so slack-jawed he could taste- whatever it was "the ground" tasted like.

" _These are your dungeons!? I've been cooped up in your poky little_ dungeons  _for the past one thousand five hundred years! I thought this was some kind of afterlife, but I'm staying in the same place you keep your drunkards and vagrants!?"_

"That is correct, Arthur. But you don't have to stay here anymore." she spoke to him  _like a child_.

"Yes,  _I am aware."_

"Then leave - and  _please_ , don't come back." her brows actually  _furrowed_ with  _desperation._ The king whipped around to look at the Window. To his shock and awe, it was glowing a bright white, so much so that Arthur had to partially cover his eyes. He looked back at Titania one last time, taking in her expression of  _pleading_. The blonde shot to his feet and leapt through the Window with the kind of enthusiasm that one would use when flinging themselves at a lover after seeing them for the first time in years.

 

 {"!+!"}

 

Merlin woke up with the quiet hum of a slight hangover in the back of his skull after a long night in the pub, saying goodbye to all his neighbours. He had a crude breakfast consisted of a nutrition bar as both his fridge and toaster no longer sat where they had been a few days before. The warlock then packed up the last few boxes and checked his watch - the moving van had already taken most of his things the day before. All Merlin had to do was put the last couple of boxes in a taxi along with himself, drop them off at the home of the crazy vinyl collector who ordered nearly  _fifty_ of Merlin's  _decades old_ collection, and bring himself and a large suitcase into his new flat near central London. 

Merlin was looking forward to it, if he was honest. He didn't really feel daunted about moving to a new area anymore, he just had a special place in his heart for London. The same place Cassie occupied, he should think - so many memories filled these streets...

As the visibly-young-but-actually-really-old-despite-even-acting-youthful man stepped out of Merlin's Magical Remedies and Herbs for the last time, he saw the taxi he'd booked waiting on the other side of the road. Locking the door with a key that he'd hand back over to the landlord on Tuesday, Merlin loaded his things into the cab. Just before he shut the boot of the vehicle, he took a deep breath of spring air. It smelled of fast food and industry and the promise of new life. he felt a hint of breeze ghost over his face and he found himself wandering the forests of Camelot with the man he so dearly loved scalding him for dropping the supplies and scaring off a deer. Merlin went to chuckle slightly, but it came out as more of a slight sob. Merlin lifted his hand to wipe away a tear as he opened his eyes. He pulled the boot shut on the taxi and swivelled around, suitcase in hand, to walk over to the passenger seat. 

A glint of golden blonde hair twinkled in the sun and Merlin whipped back around to spot a figure quite a way away from him. he was blurred by the distance and was just, standing there, arms limp at his sides as he gawked at the man standing before him. Or at least Merlin thought he was gawking...

"Excuse me?" Merlin enquired, edging in the man's direction, "Are you alright?" he was getting closer now. The man had on a loose fitting red shirt, grey jeans, baseball cap and a pair of expensive sunglasses.

"Oh!" Merlin exclaimed, "You're the cashier from the shop down the road! You were talking to m-my great uncle!" the man shut his mouth and nodded yes, "Well, aren't you talkative? What, don't I meet your standards of who's  _worthy_ of your conversation?" Merlin raised a playful eyebrow. The blonde grinned at Merlin's drawl but didn't speak, "Pompous git." Merlin accused, not giving up quite yet - because there was something about the man's smile, Merlin just couldn't put his finger on it...

"Words can't hurt me, these glasses are Gucci." the words alone made Merlin burst into laughter. They were so distracting that Merlin didn't register the voice that spoke them. Not until he looked up from his laughing fit, and his eyes were filled with a clear, purposeful blue; a crown of blonde locks, and a look so tender it made Merlin's legs nearly give way.

"Ar-Ar-Arth-you-si-sire-I..." Merlin watched the man laugh lightly at Merlin's fumbling, suddenly he got his words back.

 

" _Arthur."_  

 

Just as suddenly, Merlin flung his arms around his king's neck and held on tight, inhaling his scent in deep, rasping breaths. Arthur broke the embrace slightly and looked into Merlin's eyes, with a soft smile, he leaned closer to the face of his  _servant_. 

 _Oh Gods, this can't be happening. Arthur is_ not _about to kiss me, definitely not-or maybe he is, he definitely is, that's why he's leaning in, oh SHIT_.

And in a brief moment within Merlin's inner monologue, somebody said " _fuck it_ _"_ , and Merlin's arms were around the king of Camelot once more and he was finally doing the one thing he hadn't stopped dreaming about in well over  _a thousand years._

He was kissing Arthur, the man he loved with all his heart, with equal parts enthusiasm from  _both parties_.

Somebody up there either harboured a bitter resentment towards Merlin, or a great sympathy. Honestly? Merlin couldn't give less of a shit which one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAHHHH I know it's nearly the end of January, but PUNS?????? I suppose I could've used 20biteen, but y'know 🤷  
> ONE. LAST. CHAPTER. AAAAAAHHHHHHH. Then an epilogue. <3


	15. One Coin, Two Sides; Forever Connected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is still 2018, the day hasn't changed either.

After being honked at by the cabbie, Merlin pulled away from the kiss.

"You don't have anywhere to stay! I'm moving to my new flat in a moment, you could come along?" Arthur nodded and followed the most beautiful man alive to the black cab. Laughing and joking on the trip, Merlin decided on a game of Twenty Questions to answer anything they didn't know about.

"You didn't accept their deal until the  _turn of the twentieth century!?"_

"Well when you put it like that it sounds awful! I just didn't want Titania to have control over me, and I didn't know if I would ever return, so, I didn't wanna get too attached..." Merlin cupped his cheek and pecked Arthur on the lips out of sympathy.

\---

The conversation continued with varying reactions from Merlin;

"Thank the  _Gods_ I don't have to give you a bloody  _crash course_ on modern life!"

"Their  _dungeons!?"_

" _Ten years!_ Those bastards! _"_

"That was  _you!?"_

" _That_ was you!?"

And of course,

"I  _knew_ that was you!"

 

And then some from Arthur, such as;

"I'm sorry..."

"I'm  _so_ sorry..."

"You did all that for  _me?"_

And, finally,

" _You've had_ how  _many one night stands!?"_

 

Eventually, the conversation died down and the pair arrived at Merlin's new flat. 

"Maybe we should get a cat..." Arthur mused,

"Not before you get a job, we're not." Arthur gasped and shot Merlin a scandalised look. The paler man shrugged and grabbed a suitcase. They both collapsed onto a still-covered sofa that had been haphazardly dumped int the middle of the living room.

"Hey, Arthur?"

"Yes, Merlin?"

"Did you ever catch a glimpse of the cuff-links that I wore to Patience and Liv's wedding?"

"Yeah, the dragons. I loved them." Merlin fished a box out of his pocket, holding it to Arthur, "Proposing? So soon?"

"Shut up, you git!" he shoved the king, and they both scuffled for a moment, before Merlin pinned Arthur to the ground, straddling his hips as he opened the box, "They're something I had made a good few decades ago..." he took them out of the box and placed them into Arthur's hand, closing his finger around them, "I intended to give them to you when you returned; they're for you." he pulled Arthur's fist to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to them. 

"That's it," Arthur shook his head at the realisation that he'd been staring lovingly at Merlin,

"What?" Merlin scrunched his face as both men sat up a bit,

", I'm  _definitely_ in love with you." Merlin seemed at a loss for words, so Arthur kissed him; and neither knew how long they stayed there, basking in each other. Neither of them wanted to know, either. The Sidhe council had granted Arthur one last gift before he left their kingdom. He could spend an eternity with his love, for now, both were as immortal as the earth itself, and the magic that lay within it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I included this in the previous chapter, it would've been too long, so, here you go. 👍  
> EVERLASTING LOVE, BITCH!!!!


	16. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year is of no consequence, not anymore.

" _Meeerliiiin?"_   Arthur whined from the bathroom. Merlin sighed dejectedly and flopped his head onto the back of the sofa and squeezed his eyes shut.

"Have you gotten your phone wet again? I'm running out of rice!" 

"Uuum, n-no, not my phone..." Merlin quirked an eyebrow,

"Your watch?"

"Uh, no not that either..."

"Then what the hell have you done!?" no reply followed, and Merlin eventually came to the conclusion that he'd have to find the root of the problem himself, "Once a royal arse, always a royal  _bloody arse..."_   the warlock muttered to himself as he opened the door to the adequate bathroom, " _Gods of heaven and earth Arthur, what on earth have you DONE!?"_

There, starkers and soaking wet, was king Arthur of Camelot, with his whole bloody hand down a drain. The man's face twisted into childlike guilt as he smiled awkwardly and uttered, "I'm sorry."

"What-how-when di-what in the-Arthur-  _what happened?"_

"Well, I was gonna have a shower, so I took off my ring and set it on the side of the sink. I had a shower, lovely shower by the way, very calming-"

" _Arthur..."_

"-right, uh...I got out, went to brush my teeth and knocked it down the plughole." Merlin's mouth widened into an incredulous "O" shape and he began to speak,

"You dropped your  _engagement ring_ down a  _PLUGHOLE!?"_

"I can see you're upset-"

_"Of course I'm upset-!"_

"But I did try my best to get it out!"

"Is  _that_ why you've gotten your bloody  _hand_ stuck!?"

"Maybe..." Merlin pinched the bridge of his nose and attempted to restrain his feelings of exasperation because, believe it or not, he was in love with this man.

"Okay, well, I'll give emergency services a call and they can get your hand out, don't argue. If you try too hard you'll break your hand," Arthur looked down at his feet, looking chastised, Merlin smiled fondly, sighing through his nose as he approached his husband, "and for the Gods' sakes, Arthur, please just call a plumber next time." he cooed, stroking Arthur's hair before planting a quick kiss to his forehead and turning to exit the bathroom.

"Where are you going?"

"To phone 999, and to get you some clothes before they arrive." Merlin added with a quirk of his eyebrow. Arthur flushed a deep shade of scarlet and grumbled at him to "Get on with it then..."

 

{"!+!"}

 

The warlock re-entered a few minutes later with a pair of jeans, some underwear, and a makeshift poncho.

"Hey, I liked that blanket!" Arthur protested half-heartedly as he pulled on the boxers, then the jeans.

"Well this is much more fashionable," he defended as he slipped the hideous garment over Arthur's head, "and you can't exactly put on anything with sleeves." he mocked, glancing at Arthur's Plug Hand™. Merlin held back a snicker as he settled in front of the blonde, setting his mobile down next to him.

"So..." Arthur began,

"Twenty questions?" Merlin suggested the game which gad once been used to catch up on one another's lives, but was now just a way of recounting all the things they had done that week.

"Sure." Arthur obliged.

 

Half an hour and three hot chocolates later, both men were laughing at an anecdote from Merlin, when the warlock attempted to calm the situation,

"Okay, okay! My turn," he wiggled his eyebrows in mock-intrigue before asking, "How did you know you were immortal?" Arthur pulled a perplexed expression,

"Didn't I tell you about Gabriel?"

"No!" Merlin chuckled, Arthur smiled warmly,

"Okay well, long story short, he was the Sidhe messenger that convinced me to start visiting you - y'know, the one who fiddled with my window-" Merlin hummed in agreement around a mouth-full of hot chocolate, "He also helped me with your little floral gift," Merlin grinned wide at the memory of the flower that sat, protected with magic, on their windowsill, "And one day when I was really lonely, I asked him to discuss whether Tania could make me immortal if I ever returned to you, for good." the dark-haired beauty nodded, focused on the story, "The next day, who greets me with her cold, lifeless presence; than Queen Titania, kicking me out, no less.  _And_ Gabriel whispered something to me as I walked through the light, he said  _"Eternal life for an eternal love."_ and here I am!" Arthur splayed his arm ~~s~~ out wide in a  _voila_ fashion.

Merlin smiled, "Now I get to keep you." he took Arthur'as hand and the two shared an intimate look, before they both remembered the game.

"It's my turn right?" Arthur asked, his husband nodding, their hands intertwined. Arthur braced himself for the question. He had always wanted to ask, but he didn't want to hurt Merlin... he didn't  _have_ to answer anyway. Arthur took a deep breath and Merlin looked apprehensive, but prepared,

"Who is Cassandra Boyle?"

 

{"!+!"}

 

Merlin took a deep breath, looking to the ceiling.

"You don't have t-" the warlock held a commanding hand up in front of Arthur's face to silence him.  _Yes,_ he thought,  _I do._

"It was 1889. I was young again, she was young for the first time. I fell for her fast." he squeezed Arthur's hand reassuringly before continuing, "We lived together for around seven years, when I decided that I'd ask her to marry me..." Merlin smelled the coal dust in the air and the odour of horses wafting through those bustling London streets, a head-strong American woman with golden-blonde hair on his arm. They laughed excitedly as they walked from the cab, shoes clacking on the cobbles as they entered the train station,

\---

_"Oh, Merlin, it's so exciting, isn't it?" Cassie smiled, leaning into Merlin's side, "But I suppose you've seen advances such as these a thousand times over."_

_"Exactly, darling." Merlin planted a gentle kiss to his lover's cheek, watching as she stumbled over the cobbles, "I told you not to wear those." he nodded to Cassie's heeled shoes._

_"They're my best ones, this is a special occasion, I refuse to do as instructed by anybody, and we will be safe behind barriers throughout the demonstration." Cassandra listed as she looked around at the others gathered around the locomotive, her eyes falling on a pair of men in sharp suits,_

_"Oh look, love! Those gentlemen are taking photographs! Oh can we take one, please, dear! I know how you detest such things, but I would like to have something to remember this day!" Merlin suddenly felt the black box of velvet lining press into his side. Memories, indeed._

_"Absolutely!" they both beamed and Cassandra hurried him over to the photographers,_

_"Oh do hurry up, Merlin dear, the photo requires enough time to be taken, without your incessant dawdling." she teased, grabbing Merlin by the arm once more and posing for the photo. Merlin wrapped his arm around her waist and placed his lips on her cheek just as the photograph was captured._

_"Collections are on Tuesdee'." one of the men provided the couple. Cassandra thanked them graciously and set off towards the train, Merlin hurriedly following, wedging themselves between a mother and her young boy just behind the barriers._

_A mere few minutes later, the vehicle began to hiss into life, every spectator watching wide-eyed. Suddenly, a scuffle broke out a fair way  along the barrier from Cassandra and Merlin. A shockingly young man slipped free of the guards and made a b-line for the locomotive. Merlin froze._

_"NO!" Cassie screamed, sliding effortlessly under the barrier and dodging guards to catch the boy by the arm, Merlin followed in a panic._

_"Cassandra, don't! Leave him!"  just as the boy was slipping over the edge of the platform, the train travelling at a staggering speed straight for them. Cassandra put all her weight into yanking the boy out of the way, losing her footing in the process, her heel broke and she slipped. Time slowed and Cassandra shot Merlin a look of pure helplessness, one that would haunt Merlin for decades._

_With a yelp, Cassandra fell onto the platform seconds before the train rushed past, the morbid crack drowned out by the whistle. Merlin wanted to be sick, turning a deathly pale, he screamed; like he'd never screamed before, rivalled only by the anguished cry that punctuated the passing of the great Arthur Pendragon,_

_"CASSANDRA!!!"_   _Charlies grabbed at Merlin's flailing arms, causing his ring box to clatter to the ground, unnoticed by the warlock as he screamed and screamed and screamed into oblivion. The yells and panic behind him a distant hum compared to the thudding of his heart in his ears - something Cassie would never hear again._

_"I was going to propose to her..." his words melted into panicked squawks and loud orders from Charlies requesting the crowds return to their homes, "We were to be married..."_

_\---_

"I never told a soul about my true identity before her...she was perfect." Merlin wiped tears from his face, "I found the ring, it's in my box, you know, the private one - along with the photograph." Arthur didn't make a sound, so Merlin continued, "They covered up the... _incident,_  of course; couldn't have people riding a train responsible for that." still no sound, "I told her not to do it. I told her not to do a lot of things, never listened. She always wanted to play the hero, do the right thing. I think-I think the reason I loved her so was, was because-" Merlin took a deep breath, "-was because of how much she reminded me of you." he finally looked up at his husband.

Arthur's face was set in stone, his eyes hard, his jaw clenched. Merlin now knew that was what he did when his emotions overwhelmed him.

"There was a train in the photo, on your mantel. I never noticed it before, but it was there." Merlin nodded.

"Yeah, that one."

"Minutes before-"

"I know."

" _Gods._ Is that why, I mean, Adelaide..."

"She looked just like her."

"And she was buried in New York?"

"Her parents insisted."

"And that's why-why you were-when I first saw you-"

"Unpleasant reminders, or experiencing equally unpleasant events, is just plain dangerous for a man like me. I don't know what I would've ended up doing if you hadn't shown yourself to me..." Arthur nodded slowly. Then he leaned towards his love and wrapped his arms around Merlin. Whispering countless renditions of "I'm sorry." into his hair, then into his cheek, then his lips as the two spiralled into a slow and tender expression of gratitude and love. The only thing that broke the two apart, was the repeated ringing of the doorbell to the flat. Merlin sighed. Kissing Arthur's forehead, he pulled himself to his feet and made to open the door.

"I'm so sorry about this sir, my husband is an absolute moron sometimes-" Merlin was cut short when he came face to face with a man in his fifties carrying a toolkit. His face was stern, his eyes grey, save for a sliver of brown in the one to Merlin's right. His thin lips pressed together in a way that made you believe that was to execute you, and a scar reached its way up the man's forehead from his eyebrow. One which the man raised in question, 

"Is everything alright, sir?" those words made Merlin mentally recoil, coming from the lips of what he assumed was a victim of what Merlin could only describe as reincarnation. All that was missing from this man was a crown and a cape as red as the blood of all the druid children he spilled.

"Uther?"

"I'm sorry?"

"My apologies," Merlin waved his hand dismissively, "you just look like someone I know."

 

{"!+!"}

 

Once Arthur was freed of his plumbing restraints, the two waved the engineer off and spent at least twenty minutes laughing about how he looked  _identical_ to Arthur's father, then they both settled down in front of the telly (Arthur now clothed in a comfortable hoodie) and watched whatever new series that Netflix had recently endorsed, sharing hot chocolates and tender kisses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE DID IT!!!! This has by FAR been my most ambitious fic yet, my next one is either gonna be quite short or a crack fic, I've got two planned🤔.  
> WARNING: this chapter is long and hasn't been proofread, I'm tired, have mercy T-T.  
> I hope I didn't trigger anybody with Cassie's death, I've been leading up to this ha ha! I've loved researching this fic, and writing it, and seeing comments, and kudos, and letting it blossom into a clusterfuck, thicc with some REAL, juicy plot. It's been fun, I'm going to bed now, hope you all enjoyed, FUCK I'm tired.


End file.
